zahavasdad -“I know someone who married such a person and they had to get divorced. It isnt fair to the wife if her husband is that way. A woman wants to be needed , wanted and attracted by her husband. Why should the wife and possibly children be affected by such a person”
You’re right -it isn’t fair to the spouse (it works both ways -I know s/o who had to divorce his wife because she became one of those). The Toeivanik (male or female) should never get married in the first place. They should seek couseling and try to change and if they can’t change -they should stay single forever and Not give into any Taivahs.
Making forums for “Frum” Toeivaniks, like YU did, only increases their desire to act out their fantasies. The best thing for these people and the world is for them to go back “in the closet”!