Bear: He’s not trying to bend the rules, he’s trying his hardest to stay within them. Everyone slips up sometimes. As long as we realize that when we do it’s wrong, and we try to do better, we’re on the right path. He claims that’s what is going on with him.
How can you judge him when he has such a terrible situation to live with? He is trying his best. He says he came out about his situation to show others in it that you can live as a frum gay person. Personally, I think a frum person who is gay and is able to resist his temptations 99% of the time is amazing. I wish I was able to resist 99% of my temptations to do wrong.
Unfortunately, with your lashon hara here (which obviously I am not mekabel), you are a far cry from resisting 99% of your temptations.