Snowbun, don’t put yourself down. Don’t equate accidentally ripping toilet paper with having issues (Ch”V) keeping Shabbos. First of all you said it was accidental. In addition there are issues of kavod habriyos here, and in certain extenuating circumstances it would be permissible- just STAY AWAY from the perforations, and rip messily in middle of the tissue. Please do not take my advice and act upon it; speak to someone more learned than me, preferably your LOR. Occasionally by accident ripping a hangnail or turning on a light does not mean you are having issues. I’m sure you believe in your heart that keeping Shabbos is extremely important. As long as you give it your best shot and truly want to do it right- you’re doing fine.
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