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sw33t: To be perfectly honest, I have not been following the thread, but this post jumped out at me. I did not read your comments and they did not prompt this thread. That said, I am happy to see that you think that every child lost to the Jewish community is a tragedy. I agree.
pou_bear: I’m sorry the CR made you so mad. Please recall that this is from a Yiddishkeit perspective.
gavra_at_work: Not necessarily. There’s “honest” and there’s honest. ??? ?????? ???????
Veltz Meshugener: I agree that it is not all dysfunctional families. I know plenty of kids from dysfunctional homes who stayed on the derech, and kids from excellent homes who went off. I agree that it is far better than it has ever been (except maybe when the Bais HaMikdash was standing)
EzratHashem: Please let’s not drag shidduchim into every thread. (I was just giving an example of a BAD attitude. It is BAD to connect the issues of OTD with shidduchim.)
Gamanit: Agreed.
emunah613: Beautiful post.
The little I know: You obviously know a lot about this topic. I am impressed when you write that you are connected to 100s of kids.
I volunteer with people “at risk”, tweens, as a non-professional who helps them transition to professional help. I always emphasize that no matter what has happened to them, they have choices. Right now, they have to choose whether to face their anger / depression / academic struggles / social issues and make an effort to change, reach out to others, or they can stay unhappy, rejected, failing as they are. All eventually choose to make positive changes.
It bothers me that you blame parents and mechanchim. I do not think that they can be blamed for everything, and this only encourages the characteristic endemic of modern society of avoiding responsibility for one’s actions. Our job is to protect the kids as much as possible, teach them tools to protect themselves, and help them become constructive adults who serve Hashem in the way that is best for them.