mdd- first, i retract my “no respect’ comment fo you, as you have gone through a very tough evaluation in your life. To be a “baal teshuvo” is difficult and certainly trumsp my upbringing and my zechusim.
However, I totally disagree with you on your evaluation of past generations. Whether here or in Poland, Russia ,etc… in past centuries, it was a major struggle to keep shabbos because parnossh was so difficult. It was a majot struggle to keep kashrus properly because real kosher food was scarce. It was a major struggle just remaining jewish because the prevailing winds were so dangerous to jews. Contrast our lives to our ancestors in Spain, Portugal, Poland (Chmelnicky), Germany (Enligthement) etc… and you will see that our nisyonos pale compared to theirs. So, if they relaxed their standards just a bit but remained true to yiddishkeit, I, for one, would never criticize them.