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>> Is your problem that you feel you don’t have time or
>> want to expend attention to Torah and mitzvhos? A
>> lot of us (you’d call frummies) do that too.
I do not know. I am really Lost. I am lost between three directions:
Direction 1: I understand that I must serve G-d and work for obtaining a share in Eternal life.
Direction 2: My heart pulls me to be a writer/advocate — have not engaged in writing/polemics for a long time.
Direction 3: I am suppose to work on my unpaid internship for my Mathematics PhD — so I pretend to work.
>> A lot of us (you’d call frummies) do that too. Many
>> have degrees, professions, jobs, things they must
>> devote their time (and lives) to. That’s the way
>> Hashem made the world.
I do not work. I pretend to work for my unpaid internship. I thus do almost nothing.
>> I get the picture you’re already “here” just an
>> additional “boost” maybe is needed.
I am mostly for obtaining guidance.