Am I being unreasonable to not allowing her to hire a housekeeper”
In a word YES. I am not yet reading anyone else’s responses, because I had such a visceral reaction to your post. I think you sound like a good husband and person. But unless your wife was like this before pregnancy, you cannot possibly know how tiring pregnancy is for all of the nine months. I used to fall asleep sitting up during my lunch hour at work. I was physically uncomfortable as I became larger, and didn’t have the energy I needed to work full time and then work at home as well. Even when I stopped working in the last trimester, I literally had no energy on a regular basis. I did the laundry, the cooking, and shopping, but couldn’t do major housework and cleaning.
Give your wife a break. Unless she has been acting like a princess since you met her, compromise and get her cleaning help for a couple of hours once a week to do the heavy work (floors, carpets, bed making, etc.), Show her that you understand. After the baby comes, it will be MUCH harder for her to keep a neat house. Some women are such behriyahs that they can do it all. Many cannot, and should not be made to feel like lesser persons because of that. If money is not an issue, hire someone. Most people do.
You really do sound like a good guy, so please think about this. I haven’t had cleaning help for over 15 years, but when I was pregnant and/or had children running around, I really could not handle the workload myself at all.
*****I just decided to read some of the other posts. Please reread the wisdom that many gave over. You are a newlywed. Do what you have to, to keep the woman who is carrying your baby, happy, and bless her for being the one that gets to feel all the discomforts of pregnancy, labor, and delivery, that you do not, while bringing this child into the world b’shaa tova. AND, all this, while adjusting to the first year of marriage. Don’t forget to tell her how much you value and appreciate her. Hatzlacha rabbah.