Choson & Kallah Walking Together Into Wedding Hall – Jewish or Gentile?

Funny story but wearing hat,jacket,suit and tie actually come from the goyim as do many other things in our culture
P.s. they didn’t have a keyboard player in Europe

Chazal bring down that it was dor ha’midbar that first started the minhag of renting simcha halls and having the Lipa Shmetzer of their generation perform at chassanas……Just about every generation of yidden has put its spin on the conduct of simchas and added to the minhagim which evolve over time. There is no “right” or “wrong” way for the chassn/kallah to arrive at the simcha hall….in India they arrive on an Elephant (not sure about yidden in India)….here in the NYC area, they may arrive in an Oddessy or SUV (if the kallah is wearing her hair up) but may have to walk the last block or two because all of the cars double and triple parked in front of the simcha hall.

On the night of the l’chayim do the chosson and kallah walk into the house together or separate?

GH: I am not sure what wedding your talking about but I don’t know of many weddings where the chupa takes place at one location forcing the chosson and kallah to drive to another location (like the goyim actually do by marrying in their place of worship and the catering hall is miles away).

Joseph,

Probably not as many chasidish weddings have the men and women in different rooms.

Now instead of ignoring the numerous questions that were posed in response to your original post and asking another question, please start answering.

By many, the custom is that the chosson walks out to escort the kallh to the chuppa (IE nisuin of old, where the kallah was brought into the rishus of the chosson), others dont consider the chuppa the nisuin, but, the later parts of the wedding ceremony including yichud and perhaps the hall where the seuda is taking place.

By trolls the minhag is that the chosson escorts the kallah, as evidenced by shrek.

apy: I am pretty sure that everyone agrees that Yichud is considered nesuin. I am not sure what the main ballroom has to do with nesuin. It is not the reshus of the Chosson.

“the Choson walking into the women’s side of the mechitza ”

Joseph,

There is definitely many mekoros and Al Pi Chassidic to that minhag, there is the minhag that the Choson escorts the kala to her seat. I will post sources soon.

In Eretz Yisrael, in my personal experience, it depends on the band (not the choson, the band!)

It would have to be Jewish, since after the ceremony goyim don’t leave. They have no equivalent of our “heder yichud”.

I learned something interesting that applies here: one of the reasons why Hashem spread us through all the countries is so we can take the customs / culture / mannerisms is the country and elevate them by using them in a holy connect (obviously only in a way that is fine halachically.)

That would definitely apply to the attire of the chosson mentioned above, or the way the tables are set, and could apply to the way they come in as well – unless it’s not very Aidel…

A friend of my husband told him not to come in with me to the woman’s section because it’s not a Jewish thing and not Aidel, and so we posed together just outside the door, unfortunately the photographer missed it, and just got me standing there myself

Specific wedding customs:

“Mr. and Mrs. …. ” as referring to the hasan/kallah is clearly non-Jewish, as traditionally Jewish women did not change their names on marriage (prior to use of surnames, which were for the most part adopted by Ashkenazim in the 19th century)

Entrance ceremony – Jews had the hasan and kallah walk to the huppah with their parents, anything else is non-Jewish. Among goyim, the hasan arrives with his friends led by the “Best man”, whereas the bride is escorted by the father or senior male relative who has to “give her away” (Jewish give make their own marriage arrangments, at least in theory, so there is no guardian to give her way).

Post-wedding. Goyim traditionally leave town immediately after the wedding for a honey moon, so anything we do after our weddings (where the couple stays in town and goes to parties for a week) is Jewish.

As to what is a “custom” one should remember that customs, by definition, are constantly changing. New Jewish customs are constantly being created based on how we adapt halacha to changing circumstance. For example, 200 years ago there were no microphones or loudspeaker, nor any possible recorded music – and there were no photographers at weddings- Clothing constantly changes since new fabrics become available and styles change (e.g. no one wore pants 500 years ago) – the halacha for clothes pertain to the tallis katan and the need for modesty – the rest it how the Yidden adapt.

Joseph,

Here is the source clearly stating that there was/is custom for the Choson to escort the Kallah INTO the women’s side of the Mechitzah and sit himself down there (gasp!).

http://www.hebrewbooks.org/pdfpager.aspx?req=46545&st=&pgnum=229

the generally accepted minhag is that “yichud” is nisuin, however, many meforshei Rambam understand that any act that demonstrates that they are husband and wife is nisuin. walking hand in hand into the seuda would certainly qualify as an act that demonstrates they are husband and wife.

All of our wedding customs are original and copied by the goyim, including, as per the Talmud, the throwing of rice or grain at the Choson and Kallah.
The only exception is when the Choson and Kallah come into the hall together. Our current custom is entirely fake and meant to be politically correct to appease the more modern among us and it distorts the emes way of starting out in a new marriage together.
It had been the custom for Yidden going all the way back, that the Choson walks into the hall handcuffed to the Kallah to show everyone in attendance who is really boss. I feel there would be far fewer problems if we reverted back to this custom as the Kallah would understand early on her place in the marriage.

APY,
“walking hand in hand into the seuda would certainly qualify as an act that demonstrates they are husband and wife”
See the below link:
http://www.hebrewbooks.org/pdfpager.aspx?req=46545&st=&pgnum=219
Footnote Alef
However, he does claim that after the Yichud it has no source.
See end of footnote Vav/6:
http://www.hebrewbooks.org/pdfpager.aspx?req=46545&st=&pgnum=230

Well, I guess people apply the ballroom as the “Bais Nesuan”…

Joseph,
The name Joseph is a name that came from the Goyim.
Some goyishe minhagim that are performed at Jewish weddings are.
1. The mitzva tantz. Its a custom in eastern europe for the male guests to dance with the bride at the end of the wedding. This is completely goyish.
2. Mezinka dance with brooms and flower garlands. This is a Pagan custom

No, the name of the shevet is Yosef, not Joseph

I checked the machzor vitri. Here is the source. Machzor Vitri chelek 2:496
It states that the minhag was for the chosson and kallah to sit next to each other, and for the guests to dance around them. Nothing about male guests dancing with the kallah, that is a goyishe minhag.

“tantz is brought down in numerous Seforim HaKedoshim. (i.e. Bach – Even Haezer 21, Chelkas Mechokek, Beis Shmuel, etc.) If you have an issue with it take it up with the gedolei poskim who permitted or even mandated it.”

Joseph,
There is no mention in any of the above sources about Mitzvah Tantz. The only thing is regarding a parent hugging their child in public. No one certainly ‘mandates’ it. I am aware there were some Admorim who did perform Mitzvah Tantz, however, they had certain Kavanos Al Pi Kabalah i.e. something with the Shem , which non of us simple people have anything whatsoever to do..

Binyan:
Actually, the name of the shevet was Shevet Joseph, not Shevet Yosef….after a lengthy review of CR postings here on YWN, the Ebeshter realized that it would be easier to just go with Joseph rather than suffering through 327 postings under 14 different aliases as to why Yosef had all sorts of negative implications (e.g. his initial treamtment of his brother when they arrived im mitzrayim)

I was once by a chasunah, a BT who followed a certain “chassidus” and the girl was MO. When the chosson and kallah sat together to “keizad merakdim” one of the “chassidic” rabbi left the room stating, “it’s not our minhag” and it can potentially lead to “pritzus”. I just shook my head.