Finances………..what are we doing wrong?

What you are doing wrong is living above your means. Things that you feel are an absolute necessity are probably considered a luxury by others. I imagine that as you made more money, you increased your monthly expenses. Think back to when you made half that money, and think about if your life is really better now. While I am not telling you to go back to that, do however realize that your life is not really so simple.

Trim

Start paying attention to where the money goes. Look over your credit card bills. Money is pouring out somewhere. Vacations? Fancy wardrobe? Over $150,000 with 2 kids should leave you with leftovers if you aren’t spendaholics.

to all those who are responding as if $150K is a lot of money, think again. I am sure he means 150K on the books which comes out to about 90K after taxes. that’s the amount he actually has to spend. now figure about 24K on mortgage. 15K on tuition he is already down to 50K to live on. believe it or not that is not so much money. every expense has gone up. gas, electricity, insurance, water, food, clothing, phone etc.. it adds up very quickly. realize that trim cannot get any gov’t help such as heap and never gets a break in the frum world because he makes “so much” money. If trim would come to your simcha and give a very minimal gift you would think he is being cheap because he has a “good parnasa” every mossad that he or his wife have had or have an affiliation with expect support because they make “so much” money. At the end of the day they are left with very little. People who don’t make very much but get every program and also help and breaks from within the frum community actually seem to have it easier.

ChanieE do i trace something called “do not fargin” in the comment you make about people who own a business?

Let me tell you Chanie that try living in a bracket where your taxes are almost more than take home pay and then comment!Let’s meet and let me see your submissions for end of year taxes and i’ll show you mine easily.

The bottom line is that all is from Hashem yes, but one has to have a budget and think about tomorrow and unforseen expenses in case of emergency!

Try sitting down and making a budget. Look at your 2011 tax return to see what your income was after taxes. Deduct tuition, mortgage+tax+insurance, health insurance, auto insurance. If you are home for Pesach add several thousand dollars for that.

If you frequently use credit cards you can see where your discretionary spending is.

Sorry Chanie and i understand exactly what you mean. All i can say is that i know you will not become a moser and the people doing this so easily should be ashamed of themselves because it is pure genaiva, stealing. We do not rely on credit card spending, just on occassion if i want to order something to send overseas or rarely an online purchase. Cell phones are basic,flat rates and no texting. One thing i buy real quality are fruits and vegetables! Clothing is another story as a matter of principle i will not overpay. Good Luck and Hashem should repay you for your honesty and realize you B”H have company and alot of good advice from the CF.

I am so sorry you are under such pressure from this. i can give you my ideas, but i dont know if they’ll apply to you. whatever, you decide.

i really dont know your exact lifestyle, but i do know that you can be the “not spenders” type and still be paying a lot more for things that the “frugal” type wont.

for instance…

you mentioned that while you do wear nice clothes, you buy them on sale. on sale at kohls and marshalls, or on sale but still brand name? its possible to buy good clothes for cheap…my (womens) shoes average $20-$30, with some being $10 and nice shabbos ones $40 (which i splurged on). i consider tops and sweaters too expensive to buy if they’re over $15-$20.

you can eliminate/cut back on dry cleaning (invest in a few wrinkle free shirts? dont buy dry-clean only clothes)

only buy food on sale. look for items on really good sales, and stock up in your pantry. only food you will need, your basics that will last a while. buying canola oil and tuna fish for full price is ridiculous.

and cut back on expensive foods, reserve them for treats.and expensive food does not only=caviar. believe it or not, a basic salad with Bodek greens, cherry tomatos, avocado and hearts of palms can be very expensive. my family knows that hearts of palm is bought occasionaly, along with pre-checked lettuce, and frozen blintzes, yadda yadda…

avoid brand name items unless you are CERTAIN its more worth it. (rare, but it does happen.) do you need the Windex brand, or will Glass Cleaner work? Can you use Walmart brand Baby Wipes? not “Scotch” tape? etc.

UTILITIES: every tiny thing helps. every one degree lower that you set your thermostat, having the heat off while at work, not running water while doing dishes, shutting off lights not in use, ALL REALLY HELP.

all the small things add up. A Brita filter pitcher is a lot cheaper than bottled water, buy a few bottles and then re-use them by filling them up for work or whatever. dont buy coffee from a shop, its inevitably more expensive than your alternatives. have a friend cut your hair, or learn to trim your own so you can go for haircuts less frequently. see if your wife can do her own shaitel in a more easy, simple style, and save the shaitel macher for when its to be done real nice. buying small-sized snacks for your kids is much more expensive than buying a big bag of pretzels or chips and dividing it into baggies. give your kids water for school instead of snapple.

there are sooo many ways to save, and believe me, when you add it up, the ammount of extra money you have is incredible.

if you’re already living like this, then i really dont know what to tell you, and i really feel for you. please let me know if any of this helped, while i go wrack my brain for more ideas 😉