Frum way to propose

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  • #612432

    I am about to propose. I wanted to know if anyone had a cute frum idea for me. I want to do something big and special but I can’t really think of any ideas. PLEASE HELP

    #1010323

    Have the shadchan do it. You are not related to this woman and should NOT be asking personal questions.

    #1010324

    Do you fly? You could fly a plane overhead with a trail…

    Kidding aside, make sure it’s something that won’t come back to haunt you later.

    #1010325
    etzhar
    Participant

    Why not just ask nicely, show her how you mean to go on, being a mentsch!

    Just a thought!

    #1010326
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    Find a romantic spot, give her two dozen red roses, and ask her, “would you be my first wife?”.

    #1010328
    business1
    Participant

    You could go for a walk in a park or on a beach and have a table set up with roses, candles, and a cake that says will you marry me. You could make a scavenger hunt with any jokes you may have and that will lead her to you at the end. If I think of any more, I’ll let yum know. But in the meantime, good luck and may you have many happy and healthy years together! Mazal Tov!

    #1010329
    midwesterner
    Participant

    VM: Maybe he’s a rebbishe einikel, and she’s his first cousin?

    #1010330
    HaLeiVi
    Participant

    Train a parrot to say, “will you marry me”. Then walk with her past its cage. (But she might answer “yes”, meaning the parrot, which will come back to haunt you.

    Speaking of which, arrange with a professional Mekubal to come to her in a dream and ask the question.

    Throw a rock into her window with a message attached.

    #1010331
    ihear
    Member

    By the bridges/water are really nice have some friends set up a something nice and they can bounce before u come

    #1010332
    Sam2
    Participant

    I agree with DY, but I would leave out a word.

    #1010333

    haha sam2 i agree with you.

    my friends brother went horseriding in the forest and there in the middle of the forest was a table set up.

    my cousin made a firework at night in the shape of a question mark.

    my other cousin took her to the aquarium, and got a diver to swim past the viewing area holding a sign saying: will you marry me?

    MAZEL TOV!! hope it goes well.

    let us know if there is a mazel tov!!

    #1010334
    TheGoq
    Participant

    DY that was a very popaish post but so funny!!

    #1010335
    HaLeiVi
    Participant

    The way most people that I know do it, is they tell the Shadchan, “We are ready to finish. Are they?” If you want, you can leave a note saying, “Are you sure?”, on the table to be seen when you come home after the wedding.

    #1010336
    tzaddiq
    Member

    buy a single long stemmed rose,

    drive to a nice romantic spot,

    and sing ‘Eishes chayil mi yimtzah’***,

    then ask her after if she can be your eishes chayil.

    ***note: if you sound like a croaking frog or worse when u sing, skip this step

    #1010337
    HaLeiVi
    Participant

    Setup a telemarket call for her: press 1 if you will marry me, 2 for more time, 3 to take you off this list.

    #1010338
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    Thanks, Goq. Ever since Purim, when I dressed up like him, I’ve been having an identity crisis.

    #1010340
    HaLeiVi
    Participant

    But the teen way is to txt her, WYMM.

    #1010341
    psikreisha
    Member

    Drive up with a van & ask her ”You want to help me fill this up?”

    #1010342
    👑RebYidd23
    Participant

    Ask her if she’s a feminist.

    “Should I propose to you or are you a feminist? If you are you should.”

    #1010344
    funnybone
    Participant

    Drive to a cemetery and ask if she would like to be buried next to you.

    #1010345
    TheGoq
    Participant

    Is there a frum way to turn down a proposal?

    #1010346
    HaLeiVi
    Participant

    What if he asks if she wants to be his hand, his side or his Charufa? Does an Umdena create a Dibur by a proprosal?

    #1010348
    I. M. Shluffin
    Participant

    This is so exciting! It has to be good – she WILL care. Maybe go to the mall or a pizza shop with her and arrange for a flash mob to start when you two come in. She’ll watch it with you, but won’t notice that it was actually arranged by you until they come to a wedding song and circle around you both and you propose. Is that frum, do you think?

    #1010349
    holy brother
    Participant

    Haleivi’s proposal would basically be asking her if she learns Reb Baruch Ber, or maybe he’s suggesting a testing communication with and umdenah?

    Unless he knows who your proposing too, generally even today’s biggest “lady-tiflus-lamdanim” don’t learn Reb Baruch Ber (nor R chaim).

    And if the plan to communicate is with umdenah, you can scratch the proposal!

    Best Idea is to be yourself! Don’t copy others, be real and propose with something that expresses YOUR interest!

    #1010350
    One of the chevra
    Participant

    Why bother proposing???

    Just set up a date, and as soon as you see her say “I hereby pledge 1800- dollars to kupat Ha’ir, and will pledge another 1800- if I get engaged today!”

    Before you get a chance to say “will you” you’ll find yourself

    engaged!!

    IMPORTANT! As soon as you’re married, ask her for her Daddy’s credit card and pay up your pledges immediately!

    Whaaaaat??? You don’t beleive it??? Oy Vey! you’re mamish a koifer!!!

    Mazel Tov!

    #1010351
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    VM – Have the shadchan do it. You are not related to this woman and should NOT be asking personal questions.

    I beg to differ. There is absolutely nothing personal about it. It is a kinyan. That’s why Sam didn’t like that I used the word “romantic”.

    #1010352

    Why is everything so overritualized in yiddishkeit today?

    Getting engaged is a moment of personal growth, why does it need to be filtered through whichever “hashkafa” the couple is part of?

    Can’t it just be a special moment between two people who are going to start a family together?

    #1010353
    Sam2
    Participant

    DY: Engagement is not a Kinyan. Don’t even joke about that.

    #1010354
    oomis
    Participant

    I LIKE the flash mob idea!!!!!! Let’s hear besoros tovos soon. My son-in-law brought my daughter to the Vanderbilt Museum Planetarium, and then after the “star” show, he took her to the garden area there, where he has set up a dozen roses and champagne, and proposed to her in that gorgeous setting. It was Mother’s Day, btw, and my machetenista and I each got a new child for our present!

    #1010355
    MurphysLaw
    Member

    Fact:

    100% of divorces start with a marriage.

    #1010356
    👑RebYidd23
    Participant

    No. They occur after marriage, but the marriage does not qualify as the beginning of the divorce, as it is awkward to speak of a subject as the beginning of its own end.

    #1010357
    gefen
    Participant

    My husband is sooooooooooooooo frum that he didn’t even propose. He just took me to 47th St. in Manhattan and we walked into a store where he told me to pick out a setting. Now, isn’t that romantic? BTW, I think this was on our 3rd date. Well – it apparently worked out- our 24th anniversary is this June IY”H.

    #1010358
    notasheep
    Member

    The best is a quiet moment with no one else around. Some girls can get embarrassed if they are proposed to in public, and especially if the boy gets all hid friends involved. The best was my sister, who loves puzzles. My brother in law ordered a puzzle for her which said “will you marry me?” when she put it together. We joked at the sheva brachos that it took her a week to answer yes cause she could’t find the last piece…

    #1010359
    👑RebYidd23
    Participant

    By the way, if a parrot asks the question and she answers yes, who will she marry?

    #1010360
    ED IT OR
    Participant

    Murphyslaw:

    Good one, though it does sound familiar

    #1010361

    The frum way is to do it b’tznius. Nothing loud or unusual. The idea of making a big deal out of it does not stem from Torah culture.

    #1010362

    notasheep thats soo cool… AND FUNNY!!

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