He didn't get insulted

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Viewing 24 posts - 1 through 24 (of 24 total)
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  • #592823
    real-brisker
    Member

    What does it mean when people say, “I told him nicely – he didn’t get insulted” Whats the diffrence how you said it?

    #705060
    Helpful
    Member

    Nicely.

    #705061
    Sacrilege
    Member

    How do you know he didnt get insulted?

    #705062
    blinky
    Participant

    respectfully

    #705063

    Sac asks right… How DO you KNOW he didn’t get insulted?

    #705064
    HennyK
    Member

    You don’t know if s/he got insulted, but you want to justify yourself so you say, “I said it nicely…”

    #705065
    Chosson
    Member

    Unless heshe is a very good acteress you can usually tell when a person takes it easily or not

    #705066
    real-brisker
    Member

    sac – Yes thats my point

    #705067
    oomis
    Participant

    I take insults “nicely,” but am still insulted. I believe in not responding in kind. There is no such things as a nice insult. Perhaps a better expression is, I gave a helpful suggestion, and it was not taken the wrong way.

    #705068
    Sacrilege
    Member

    The point is you always have to be thinking 100 steps ahead of your mouth moving.

    #705069
    bpt
    Participant

    I think its more to reassure themselves that what / the way they said was justified (even if they tore a hole in the persons heart)

    #705070
    Sister Bear
    Member

    yeah and saying no offense before, does not make it okay to say whatever you were going to say.

    #705071
    WIY
    Member

    Sacrilege

    100 steps? I think 1 or 2 steps is more than most humans can hack.

    #705072
    real-brisker
    Member

    So how are we supposed to give constructive critisism?

    #705073
    Sacrilege
    Member

    WIY

    Well I’ve installed the Filter 10K on my mouth, since at any given moment thousands of things are pouring into my brain and are begging to be said.

    #705074
    oomis
    Participant

    “The point is you always have to be thinking 100 steps ahead of your mouth moving. “

    Yep – put the brain in gauge before outting the mouth in gear.

    “So how are we supposed to give constructive critisism? “

    First, make sure your criticism is both warranted AND constructive. I have a friend who loves to criticize everyone and anyone, because she is absolutely convinced she knows what is best for them. She is rarely correct.

    #705075
    WIY
    Member

    Sacrilege

    “Well I’ve installed the Filter 10K on my mouth, since at any given moment thousands of things are pouring into my brain and are begging to be said.”

    I never understood people like that. I wish I could be more that way. I am not this big shmoozer in real life. Not for lack of what to say, but maybe lack of interest in socializing. Who knows.

    #705076
    WIY
    Member

    Sacrilege

    Does your mouth tend to get you in trouble in real life?

    #705077
    Sacrilege
    Member

    WIY

    Neither am I, maybe that filter is a bit too strong maybe I should down grade.

    #705078
    pascha bchochma
    Participant

    I’m trying to think of a situation where the title of this thread would not come from speaking about other people in a way that’s not l’toeles.

    #705079
    aries2756
    Participant

    “So how are we supposed to give constructive critisism? “

    The point is you don’t have to!

    #705080
    Sacrilege
    Member

    WIY

    No, not really.

    Maybe when I was younger. I would always butt in to the adult conversations with snappy one liners and they would get a kick out of it, but I have since matured 🙂

    In “real” life I dont usually voice my opinion, I guess thats why I like commenting in the CR. I mean, at work obviously I do.

    I dont like confrontation, and my family is pretty competative in that way so I usually back down quickly and dont push the issue or I dont get in on the big ‘fiery’ debates at all unless directly asked for my *expert* opinion 😉

    #705081
    WIY
    Member

    Sacrilege

    I take it you are one of the younger ones in your family and therefore let everyone older say their piece.

    At home I voice my opinion, but in public I usually don’t because not everyone can handle the truth…the opinions I express here I could never express in public with most people.

    #705082
    Sacrilege
    Member

    WIY

    Not so much… I am the second to oldest.

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