Info on BMG

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  • #610955
    Vogue
    Member

    Could anyone please tell me more about bmg? Like hashkafa, freezer policy, internet rules… etc.

    #984883
    squeak
    Participant

    The first thing you need to know is you don’t stand a chance of getting in if you are a girl.

    #984884
    zahavasdad
    Participant

    Internet Rules Forbidden

    Hashkafa very Pre-war Lithunanian, very strict on most things

    I dont know freezer policy as I know the Kollel guys there not Bochrim

    #984885
    LevAryeh
    Member

    They accept after Pesach and Sukkos; usually not for Elul Zman. For Winter Zman, no dating until Tu B’Shvat. For Summer Zman, no dating until Tisha B’Av (official end of zman).

    If you’re dating a girl before the zman starts, you can submit her initials to the office and continue dating her.

    If you break the freezer rules, the Roshei Yeshiva will not come to your wedding.

    #984886
    Vogue
    Member

    So like what konds of rules do the kollel wives have to follow?

    #984887
    Vogue
    Member

    Anyone?

    #984888
    FriendInFlatbush
    Participant

    You can only enter after Sukkos Zman or Pesach Zman (not Elul). Those entering after sukkos are in the dating freezer until Tu B’shvat unless they submit the initials of the girl they are currently dating. For after Pesach, the freezer rule applies until Tisha B’av (I believe). If you violate the freezer rules, the Roshei Yeshiva won’t come to your wedding.

    #984889
    Vogue
    Member

    Could you be there part time while working full time. I am looking for a learner earner… I mean do they look down on such a bochur… also what yeshiva did you learn in? Previous threqds you started indicate your a guy…

    #984890
    apushatayid
    Participant

    “So like what konds of rules do the kollel wives have to follow?”

    The hanhala insists that the wives attend sedarim regularly and arrive on time or they will be asked to find another beis medrah to learn in.

    #984891
    Vogue
    Member

    I highly doubt it.

    #984892
    pixelate
    Member

    There aren’t any rules for the wives. Just, the guy has to be a good learner to get in because there is a very hard oral acceptance test on gemara. and good learners usually marry people from their own sphere ex, have no connection to secular culture (do not have TVs and dress very modestly) however there are many exceptions.

    I know people in Lakewood that have 9-5 jobs, or are in college and at the same time learn at yeshiva for night seder. There are also night seder programs for those types of people.

    #984893
    LevAryeh
    Member

    Thanks, FriendInFlatbush, for an exact repetition of what I said.

    #984894
    WIY
    Member

    LAB

    Funny.

    #984895
    Vogue
    Member

    Right but I mean in order to make a decent living you have to go to school for a degree. To me a learner earner is either pursuing a degree or certificate or at least having some sort of white collar job other than being a rabbi. I don’t care if he works for the frum community exclusively but the job can’t be rabbi because that isn’t a parnassa that will allow financial stability and in most cases requires a family to be on welfare in olam hazeh. I don’t want to be on welfare because I feel and based on conversations I have had with secular Jews, many people who are not frum choose not to be religious because of the chillul Hashem that the amount of us on welfare causes. And on top of that although having many kids is important, the facts that we frum yidden know as our core beliefs and ideologies are seen as wrong in the secular world.

    #984896
    pixelate
    Member

    vogue-To me a learner earner is either pursuing a degree or certificate or at least having some sort of white collar job other than being a rabbi.

    I disagree. what’s wrong with a blue collar job?

    many people who are not frum choose not to be religious because of the chillul Hashem that the amount of us on welfare causes

    That is not true. you see, being frum has no connection to welfare. Learning full time may, but much less than being black has to do with welfare.

    #984897
    Vogue
    Member

    As crazy as it sounds, I went to a public high school with a significant percentage of the student body being unaffiliated jews, some who barely know anything other than krusty the clown in the simpsons portraying every jewish stereotype. Some who attend reform hebrew schools with teachers who are chiloni israelis who resent chareidim and turn off their students from yiddishkeit, some who attended a day school that is not frum and the only way they could operate was by accepting goyim in the school meaning the kids at that day school had classmates who went to church on sunday. Many had parents who went off the derech and have grandparents who are frum that refuse to talk to their grandchildren who did nothing wrong and as a result they resent their frum grandparents. And other tragic stories like this … I live in an area full of apikorsus, I have cousins who won’t talk to me because I am not zionistic. Why do you think kiruv is so hard, how come half our countrys jewish population feels the need to intermarry and disregard our mesorah, or at least the fragment they knew, why is bris milah so controversial, why did someone need to write a book about rescuing jewish kids who were brainwashed by christian cults, what about the chassid who became a muslim terrorist? All of these aveirahs lead to extra money in olam hazeh but nothing in olam habah. Your lucky that even though I am a bt, that I am very strong in my level of yiddishkeit because otherwise the lack of critical thinking on your part would have made me reconsider my decision to become religious. I grew up with these stereotypes ingrained in me as a little kid… you clearly have been involved in a community that discourages questions and therefore are deficient in your critical thinking… our sages were excellent in critical thinking yet now, we can’t even give powerful answers and when I do try to analyze something people think I am nuts… rethink your answer and come back…

    #984898
    Vogue
    Member

    However, I will acknowledge that I consider myself yeshivish, yet as much as I want to shelter my kids, I know on a conscious level that whenever they, when they come, will visit my mother when I am not there, there is a good chance they will watch tv at some point while I am gone. But that doesn’t mean I will make a big deal about leaving my kids with my mother so my mother can babysit them and spend time with them.

    #984899
    zahavasdad
    Participant

    Not trying to discourage here,but have you lived the Yeshivish Lifestyle for a time.

    Its better to try to live that lifestyle BEFORE you get married than afterwards , have kids and realize it isnt for you.

    I have heard of too many stories of people who went from secular and took on too much too fast and it all expolded when they couldnt hack it. The Yeshivish lifestyle is hard. Make sure you can hack it while you have a chance to make a choice.

    #984900
    zahavasdad
    Participant

    Be aware that in most cases the Father-in-law (Meaning Your father) is expected to pay for your husband to be able to learn in Kollel.

    I know many people there (Lakewood) and they live in very tough poverty

    #984901
    Vogue
    Member

    I have been religious for four years four and a half months.

    #984902
    pixelate
    Member

    why is bris milah so controversial?

    it is not. most males happen to be circumcised.

    what about the chassid who became a muslim terrorist?

    a flippin rarity

    why did someone need to write a book about rescuing jewish kids who were brainwashed by christian cults

    Nowadays, no one goes off because of philosophical indoctrination. it is the lure of culture.

    #984903
    Ender
    Participant

    Vogue:

    Based on what you say you are looking for, Lakewood is probably not what/where you are looking for. Although it is possible that you would find the guy you are looking for over there, he definitely would not be the norm. May I suggest that you focus your search elsewhere, perhaps Ner Israel?

    #984904
    zahavasdad
    Participant

    Being Yeshivish is not the same as being just relgious if that makes sense. Its a lot more stricter

    Id suggest finding a job as a babysitter or mothers helper in Lakewood in exchange for some room and board and hopefully get to see what life is really like. People do not talk about the bad only the good,Living with a bad you will get a complete picture.

    Maybe you will like what you see and then you can join and marry a kollel guy,but maybe you wont and you can leave without any harm done.

    You are young, and I dont care what anyone says, You dont need to get married NOW you can wait a year or 2. Learn about the life from the inside and not the outside looking in, The life is very different from the inside. If you like the life your bashert will be waiting for you.

    #984905
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    “People do not talk about the bad only the good”

    Lol. You haven’t been paying attention to the CR.

    #984906
    Vogue
    Member

    I hear and actually I have met and know people who live in lakewood… you would be surprised about the amount and variety of frum experiences I have…

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