January 17, 2019 1:26 pm at 1:26 pm #1664023
Atheist ואתא מלאך המות ושחט ל
That made the spaghetti monster doubt himself
That ate O’Keefle
That split into two and rejoinedJanuary 17, 2019 1:59 pm at 1:59 pm #1664029
Little did the spaghetti monster know that spaghetti was O’Keefle’s favorite food…
Also, little did the spaghetti monster know that there were people around town referring to him as “the speghatti monster”January 17, 2019 4:27 pm at 4:27 pm #1664105
But the spaghetti monster was still doubting himself, and he vomited.January 17, 2019 5:06 pm at 5:06 pm #1664118
But as O’Keefle was being vomited out of the spaghetti monster an alien spacecraft abducted both O’Keefle and Baruch. “This will complete our research of the human brain” one of the aliens says to the other and they promptly switch O’Keefle’s brain with Baruch and send them back down to earthJanuary 17, 2019 5:17 pm at 5:17 pm #1664125
When they came back to earth, they noticed that something was different. First, they realized that they switched bodies!! They then ran out onto the street and they saw that the aliens turned everyone into alpacas! Then they chapped-it was the aliens that made the original talking alpacas all along and switched their bodies!!!February 2, 2019 8:32 pm at 8:32 pm #1672610
Then, the alien police arrived and arrested the aliens for violating intergalactic law. They sent a team to switch Baruch and O’Keefle back and turn all the alpacas human, including the ones who had been alpacas all along. Then they erased all the human’s memories of the aliens.
Baruch and O’Keefle were dropped off in a department store in the big city, because the aliens didn’t know where to put them, so they figured it was best to put them somewhere where there were a lot of other humans to help them find their way home. Unfortunately, it was very disconcerting for Baruch and O’Keefle to find themselves face to face in the housewares department.
At first, Baruch forgot that this O’Keefle was both good and bad. He panicked, realizing that he was in the same place as his old enemy and political opponent. But then he realized that this O’Keefle was both good and bad and 100% confused.
“How do you feel now?” Baruch asked O’Keefle gently. “Do you think you need to go back to the hospital? Or do you perhaps know how we got here?”
O’Keefle didn’t know how they had gotten there, and he didn’t know how to deal with his conflicting emotions. He felt like robbing a bank and using the money to combat extreme poverty in third world countries, or maybe just ordering lunch, cursing at the waiter, and leaving a ten thousand dollar tip. Baruch could tell O’Keefle still felt mentally anguished, so he decided he’d bring him to the hospital after some shopping. They both needed new clothes after a day of, well, he couldn’t quite remember, but their clothes were both tattered. He knew the good side of O’Keefle wouldn’t let him do anything too bad, and vice versa. Baruch offered to pay for O’Keefle’s clothes, but the bad side of O’Keefle was too proud to accept, while the good side didn’t want to impose.
As Baruch and O’Keefle looked through a rack of suits, they were approached by a sheepish-looking
alpacaman. “Hello,” the man said. “I’m terribly sorry, but can you help me find clothing that doesn’t have any buttons? I can’t explain why, but I am completely unused to having opposable thumbs.”February 2, 2019 8:48 pm at 8:48 pm #1672617
The man then spit at them. He apologized immediatly and said he’s been having the urge to spit app day.February 2, 2019 10:32 pm at 10:32 pm #1672632
Alas, there was only one place to find clothing without buttons, Paris, Texas!
But to go to Texas, they’d have to cross the border between Texas and another US state.
Baruch dug for his driver’s license, which his wife’s dog’s cousin buried in the backyard.
Soon enough Baruch, O’Keffle and the sheepish man were in Baruch’s pink Cadillac. His wife earned the snazzy card
from her Mary Kay sales success.
There they were, like three musketeers on the road to Paris! Off to buy buttonless clothing!
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