Shidduchim – NASI's escrow program has run its course

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  • #611719
    AZOI.IS
    Participant

    I heard from a NASI member who was emailed today from NASI, that the NASI program is no more and money invested will be returned and a new program will be introduced.

    Does anyone know why NASI finally decided to fold, and what the new program that theyre planning on introducing, will be like?

    I give the NASI organization credit for being honest about it.

    #998049
    miritchka
    Member

    Wow! I’m surprised but I’m also not surprised. I wonder what the reasoning for this is…I guess we’ll have to wait and see.

    #998050
    ubiquitin
    Participant

    Is it because they realized the age gap is nonsense?

    #998051
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    More likely because people weren’t willing to put down that kind of money, and there was limited publicity because people weren’t doing it.

    #998052
    askangvir
    Participant

    Go say that to the older single girls that have not gone out in months!

    #998053
    AZOI.IS
    Participant

    Imho, the age gap might have been ONE factor in causing the problem, but theres no way you can do anything about it. Guys and their mothers decide what they want.

    Most of those who invested in NASI were older girls, who are very hard to find Shidduchim for. At that age everone has already heard of all the available names out there. The Shadchan potentially making a killing when he/she makes a Shidduch, isnt going to change the singles’ interest in a date with someone, if theyre not interested.

    #998054
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    They should have asked angvir for advice.

    #998055
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    That doesn’t mean NASI folded, just this particular program.

    I actually think the reason it didn’t succeed is because people perceived it as a slight to older girls.

    In other words, Medium Size Shadchan was right.

    http://www.theyeshivaworld.com/coffeeroom/topic/to-date-there-have-been-72-shidduchim-nasi-ad

    #998056
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    I actually think the reason it didn’t succeed is because people perceived it as a slight to older girls.

    It might help them to be perceived as slight.

    #998057
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    I feel very bad for the girls who have to weight.

    #998058
    yitzchokm
    Participant

    DY-

    Not nice

    #998059
    askangvir
    Participant

    What a shame that such a beautiful organization closed down .

    #998060
    SayIDidIt™
    Participant

    DY: Thanks for the laugh!!

    SiDi™

    #998061
    squeak
    Participant

    Come on yiddin lets sing a niggun:

    Utzu eitzah v’sufahr…

    #998062
    askangvir
    Participant

    I’m not sure what there is to laugh at ? Are denying that there is a shidduch crisis ?

    #998063
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    Yes, squeak, ubiquitin, and WIY (who am I forgetting?) don’t think there’s a shidduch crisis.

    #998064
    ubiquitin
    Participant

    Whoa DY! I never said that

    Just that the “age gap” is not THE cause(I’m not convinced it is even A cause but am willing to concede that point

    PS Your comment was funny

    #998065
    apushatayid
    Participant

    people were getting confused by all the messages coming out. turns out shadchanim were setting up 20 year old guys with 30 year old girls. perhaps once they hit the reset button and come out with a clear and unambiguous message more people would get on board.

    #998066
    squeak
    Participant

    DY- Way to misrepresent the facts! Howsabout you stick to speaking for your own self.

    #998067
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    Ubiquitin and squeak, you’re right, we’ve only disagreed about the cause and/or definition, not whether it exists. Sorry.

    Ubiquitin, thanks.

    Squeak, other than cynicism, I don’t think you’ve shared with us your take on the cause or definition of the “shidduch crisis”.

    #998068
    GM1
    Member

    The ‘Age Gap’ is one of the main causes! My father, an actuary, was very involved with NASI in developing the Age Gap Theory. He has done extensive research on the topic and has put together many articles and lengthy reports proving every minor detail involved with the theory. One day when he retires and has the time, he will publish his work.

    #998070
    shul
    Member

    Which program is closing?

    What happened to the program that was going to stop the boys from going to EY until they grew up, uh got married?

    #998071
    squeak
    Participant

    No, I have. I just didnt repeat myself every time az rolled out the age gap train. The shidduch crisis is almost definitely a result of unrealistic expectations and standards, coupled with a lack of self awareness and or self honesty on the part of most 20 something year olds.

    I dont have a horse in the race so its easy to be more passionate about this than me and drown out my opinions. But its not as though I dont have any. In this case, my beef was with the manipulation and force feeding on the part of az and his ilk, and really had nothing to do with the specific theory under discussion.

    #998072
    squeak
    Participant

    GM1 tell your father to email me even one report in its rawest form. Mods can handle the routing. Not that i am qualified to agree or disagree with it (though i know people who i could show it to and ask) but i dont believe any such thing exists. The only work or data that i have been allowed to see was phony balony extrapolation based on unreliable (fundamentally broken) data. No actuary or mathematician has been willing to show his face or name in connection with any write up or presentation, and for good reason.

    Now show me youre not bluffing.

    #998073
    Torah613Torah
    Participant

    I do believe that this is an appropriate place to plug my thread, which is the top Google result for “Shidduch crisis theory”: http://www.theyeshivaworld.com/coffeeroom/topic/bread-theory-of-the-shidduch-crisis

    #998074
    YW Moderator-127
    Moderator

    GM1, this mod will take care of routing a report to squeak.

    #998075
    AZ
    Participant

    The NASI Project is B”H very alive and very well and is continuing with its activities of the last 6 plus years.

    One program that started two years ago has run it’s course and was thus discontinued.

    #998076
    squeak
    Participant

    Thanks Achashverosh!

    #998077
    squeak
    Participant

    In that case az, i look forward to singing utzu eitzah v’sufahr again on each “activity” individually.

    #998078
    AZOI.IS
    Participant

    AZ, my friend!

    I spoke to a close friend this morning who had MUCHO BUCKSO invested in NASI, who got an email this morning saying shed be getting back all her money because the Nasi Program is no longer functioning, and a new program is being designed…..

    Who here has comprehension problems?

    She was sort of happy/sad that she’d be getting all her money back (happy) but all her dreams dashed (sad).

    OY….

    AZ, my friend, can you clarify?

    #998079
    AZ
    Participant

    Not sure what is not to understand. In the last 6 plus years NASI has been involved in many different efforts to alleviate the difficult shidduch situation. ONE program that was created (and generated a lot of silly talk in the media) was started two years ago. That program is being discontinued now- having run it’s course.

    For thoose who like numbers. That program generated over 200 dates, the average age of the young women getting set up was over 27 years old, and there were 5 engagements directly from that program. Including a few young women who had been dating a very very long time.

    All other efforts of the NASI Project are still active as the project stays true to it’s mission to continue to do whatever it can to alleviate the difficult shidduch situation.

    (one program for example are the various community based programs that have generated close to 2000 different dates, average age of the young women is 24 years old, 360 plus young women have dated seriously and well over 100 engagements via the program- and the young women and their families aren’t even aware of the programs.)

    If you read this weeks newspapers, you will see evidence of other efforts that are underway.

    The program that was discontinued- had simply run its course.

    And of course all funds are being returned having been carefully safe guarded and untouched.

    #998080
    AZOI.IS
    Participant

    AZ, I constantly read how Shadchanus money paid in advance and held in escrow is the MAIN fuel and key to the success of Nasi, and therefore so crucial to be paid, if the money advantage to the Shadchanim, is no more, what will be the attraction to the Shadchanim now?

    #998081
    ubiquitin
    Participant

    GM1, moderator 127

    I would love one too please!

    #998082
    AZ
    Participant

    AZOLis: it is clear that you are very unaware of what NASI has done is doing or is planning on doing.

    The program of money in advance in escrow etc was the smallest piece of what the Project was doing and continues to do.

    If you would like to get involved in the project feel free to contact them and offer your assistance, i’m sure they’d be glad to take you up on your offer.

    #998083
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    Squeak, how do “unrealistic expectations and standards, coupled with a lack of self awareness and or self honesty on the part of most 20 something year olds” explain the disparity in the numbers of males vs. females in the shidduch parsha? Or are you denying that there is such a disparity?

    #998084
    squeak
    Participant

    DY- of course, the premise is flawed. The disparity as you refer to it is an illusion. It’s not a numbers problem but a selection problem.

    #998085
    askangvir
    Participant

    Please explain your theory .

    #998086
    golfer
    Participant

    In last week’s parsha we learned,

    Chaval al d’avdin …

    So I’m wondering why that’s not part of the title of this thread.

    #998087
    147
    Participant

    NASI was so on Target, and it would be a tragedy of unbelievable proportions, if NASI went down & under.

    I know several people whom I am extremely close to, whose wives are older than they, and their sons are dating girls older than they.

    NASI:- We need you!! Please continue being active during 2014 and beyond!!

    #998088
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    It’s like a bakery. Everyone wants the french baguette, but eventually even the round challah roll gets bought.

    #998089
    AZ
    Participant

    147- NASI (thankfully) isn’t disappearing- A quick glance at this weeks newspapers should make that very obvious.

    #998090
    🍫Syag Lchochma
    Participant

    my husband is more like a chocolate chip cookie

    #998091
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    Squeak, the equation goes (approximately): Avg. 5 kids per family = 3.3% annual population growth. 3.3% annual population growth + 3 yearcage gap = 10% disparity. Which fact(s) or equation(s) do you disagree with?

    For my part, I don’t disagree that sociological factors can make the problem look worse than it actually is, but I think there is a fundamental demographic issue.

    Golfer and 147, read AZ’s post. NASI is still around, they just closed one program.

    Popa, that’s true unless there are enough baguettes for everyone, in which case the challah rolls will remain unsold. That’s why that analogy was never a good one.

    #998092
    mazal77
    Participant

    You want more, boys?? They ARE out there. but we have to get going on Kiruv and bring the boys back into the fold. You want more boys, then we need to teach them a parnassah so they can support their future families. Getting boys to date earlier is not the solution. Helping the boys try to find an income and giving them confidence would work wonders. How is a 20 year old boy ready to get married?? How is he suppose to support a wife and kids. In today’s day and age both husband and wife, in most cases need to work. Unless the parents are willing to support, but how can the parents support all their married kids, when they have single children at home?? How are single parents suppose to support married kids, when they are already struggling. I keep saying it, but the emphasis on the boys in most Yeshivas is to get them learning, where in most cases, the boys should not be there full time. They are concentrating on the rare masmid, and the other boys get lost in the shuffle and pay. There is nothing wrong with our boys working. There should be Yeshivas, that teach a trade as well, part time and learn the other half. Unless the current situation changes, most boys will look for girls, with families who are willing to support the couple, and those type of families are far and few.

    #998093
    oyyoyyoy
    Participant

    sorry but most guys at least five yr learners are fine. not the problem.

    #998094
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    Popa, that’s true unless there are enough baguettes for everyone

    No, that would just cause a redefinition of who is a baguette and who is a challa roll.

    #998095
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    No, that would just cause a redefinition of who is a baguette and who is a challa roll.

    I’m assuming there are enough baguettes for everyone, plus some extra challah rolls, and that everyone just buys one roll (if more people would be solution oriented as you are, and buy multiple rolls, there wouldn’t be as many left over).

    #998096
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    Maybe it would help if everyone bought day old rolls instead.

    #998097
    10-Luchos
    Participant

    Perhaps the program was shut because people woke up the the fact that “Just pay them and things will work out” doesn’t work.

    #998098
    10-Luchos
    Participant

    >>For thoose who like numbers. That program generated over 200 dates, the average age of the young women getting set up was over 27 years old, and there were 5 engagements directly from that program. Including a few young women who had been dating a very very long time.<<

    Directly??

    You really want us to believe that there is NO WAY of these FIVE engagements happening over TWO YEARS had it not been for you, er, the NASI program?

    Please

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