Traumatizing Children with Horrific Tales

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  • #611490
    👑RebYidd23
    Participant

    Henny Penny and her group get eaten by a fox. The oysters are eaten by the walrus and the carpenter. In some versions, Goldilocks and Little Red Riding hood are eaten. Many children’s tales contain such details that are certainly no help in preventing nightmares in children.

    #1006109
    TheGoq
    Participant

    Goldilocks and little red riding hood got eaten because they didn’t dress tznius even though lrrh covered her hair she tempted the wolf with her basket full of herring.

    #1006110
    live right
    Member

    how about the song “Rock-a-by baby”? has a very cheery ending.

    And back in the day when classic childrens stories were being written, it seems like there was a very strong anti-wolf feeling amongst the populace.

    #1006111
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    My third and prettiest (size zero obviously) and most tzanua wife points out that little red riding hood was not tznius because she wore red.

    Also, she talked to the wolf who was a man. It does NOT matter that she thought it was her grandmother. First, because the wolf did not think so. And second, because she should have been diligent and investigated!

    #1006112
    👑RebYidd23
    Participant

    But did she deserve to die for wearing red?

    #1006113
    WIY
    Member

    Polygamist bar Abba?

    #1006114
    👑RebYidd23
    Participant

    Monogamy is the cause of the infamous Shidduch Crisis.

    #1006115
    ☕ DaasYochid ☕
    Participant

    Well, pba must be a big proponent of making personal sacrifice to alleviate the shidduch crisis.

    #1006116
    👑RebYidd23
    Participant

    Yes. And here is a tale not to tell to children: The wolf only bit Little Red Riding Hood and both survived. Goldilocks escaped from the bears. Both these evil women married Popa, who was willing to sacrifice his sanity–or whatever of it still remained–to protect the rest of the world from them. Later the wolf and the bears tracked the women down and tried to eat them. For no apparent reason, Little Red Riding hood was pointing a gun at Popa, who jumped in front of the wolf. The wolf tried to swallow him whole and choked to death, leaving him with only a scratch. The bears fainted, and the two evil women pushed them into the fire and vanished in a puff of smoke.

    #1006117
    interjection
    Participant

    There’s a German bedtime story that goes something to the effect of, “there once was a boy who sucked his thumb. His mother told him to stop but he wouldn’t. So, she cut off his thumbs. Now he has no thumbs. The end.” It’s a little longer than that but that’s the exact story line. Also, remember another German bedtime story Hansel and Gretel? They get put in an oven because they liked candy (I think).

    #1006118
    WIY
    Member

    No wonder the Germans came up with the idea of concentration camps.

    #1006119
    Shopping613 🌠
    Participant

    Hansel and Gretel came upon a house of candy, inside a witch lived and pretended to be nice and fed them and gave them a home until she had fattened them up, then she threw them in a fire and ate them. The end

    #1006120
    streekgeek
    Participant

    I was always so scared of the Three Little Pigs and Beauty and the Beast. I did not have a childhood cuz I watched this stuff.

    #1006122
    👑RebYidd23
    Participant

    Beauty and the beast teaches that it’s okay to imprison innocent people for one’s own benefit.

    #1006123
    day by day
    Member

    Dr Seuss – Are you my Mother?

    #1006124
    Torah613Torah
    Participant

    Now that I’m an adult, I often worry about being eaten. I never did get over learning those frightening fairy tales.

    #1006125
    Torah613Torah
    Participant

    The truth is, my family didn’t really have fairy tales, and the ones I read were the child-friendly versions.

    I read 2 Holocaust books when I was 7 (Sisters In the Storm and From Light to Darkness, or something like that), and had nightmares for a long time afterwards. Would I let my kids read them? I dunno. Somehow I’m glad that that’s what scared me and not fairy tales.

    #1006126
    PBT
    Member

    I’ve been to some homes where children are told about G-d getting angry at the Jewish people and punishing us. Even though it’s true, I’ve often had the impression that it wasn’t handled as it should have been based on the ages of the children who were being told.

    #1006127
    oyyoyyoy
    Participant

    the hunchback etc. teaches you that if your ugly then dont expect to marry who you want to. and its scary btw

    #1006128
    writersoul
    Participant

    The original Grimm fairy tales are MUCH worse than the Disney ones (and I already was scared by the evil queen in Snow White when I was a kid…). Pretty much everyone dies, and quite horribly.

    oyyoyyoy- Hunchback is actually a novel by Victor Hugo.

    My first thought after reading the thread title was all of the tznius horror stories I heard to “inspire.” Yep, yep.

    edited

    #1006130
    writersoul
    Participant

    I don’t remember what I wrote- what was edited?

    Just out of curiosity.

    We were actually talking about this at the Shabbos table and my sister thinks that Roald Dahl’s books should be banned for kids. I think that she’s out of her… I mean, I think that she’s wrong.

    #1006133
    oomis
    Participant

    I agree, and therefore re-wrote most of these tales when telling my grandchildren these fairytales. In it, Goldilocks apologizes to the Three Bears for entering their home without permission and using their things, they invite her to join them for dinner, because it is a mitzvah to invite guests, and she apologizes to her mommy for leaving the house without her knowledge.

    Little Red Riding Hood gets a similar treatment, only she is bringing a Shabbos treat to her Bubby, and he learns the meaning of sharing and apologizes for trying to trick her and for hiding her Bubby in the closet. Of course, she invites him to join them for an Oneg Shabbos party.

    The three little pigs end up telling the wolf that if he was so hungry, all he had to do was ask nicely, and they invite him to share a meal also. (See my recurring theme of hachnossas orchim?) My very wise little granddaughter told me today, “But Bubby, how could the three pigs do hachnossas orchim? They aren’t even KOSHER!

    I never call Cinderella’s stepmother her wicked stepmother, either. I just call her the Bossy Lady and her two daughters.

    For anyone who might think this is dumbing down the stories, or whatever, there is enough ugliness in the world. I prefer to tell tales that have a good point to them.

    Apropos of Rockabye Baby, many years ago I posted my own original alternate ending to the song (and my granddaughter will insist that my version is THE version). “When the bough breaks, the cradle won’t fall, ki Hashem Elokeinu, shomeir al ha-kol.”

    #1006134
    Abba bar Aristotle
    Participant

    I was very traumatized, as a child, by some of the classic scary stories. At least one of them still bothers me. Please do not read them or tell them to your children.

    #1006135
    popa_bar_abba
    Participant

    Oh, I thought you just didn’t like fiction stories

    #1006139
    writersoul
    Participant

    oomis: Worthy of Beatrix Bloxam.

    I actually read a children’s book recently called Baxter, The Pig Who Wanted To Become Kosher. It’s pretty much how you’re picturing it in your head now.

    #1006142
    notasheep
    Member

    Thank goodness Rapunzel got updated

    #1006143
    oomis
    Participant

    Oy, I just re-read my post (written at well…very late for me having not slept much over Shabbos… and saw all the typos). Gevalt!!!!

    What typos?

    #1006145
    tzaddiq
    Member

    oomis-

    i loved your versions, and agree with your granddaughter, that those ARE the real versions! or should be!

    whenever i tell people that my kids don’t know of disney and all these fairy tales, they look at me like i’m crazy for depriving my kids from this essential ingredient to a healthy upbringing. i’d rather my kids be fluent in all the wonderful jewish stories and torah, and totally ignorant of these shtussim i grew up with. but now i can use your versions and entertain them in a yiddish way. thanks!

    #1006146
    writersoul
    Participant

    tzaddiq: I’d say I know both, and I’m not exactly damaged IMHO…

    (Actually, I’m not sure whether I’m actually very mildly insulted or just antagonized by my head cold and projecting onto you, so sorry… but while I don’t think that watching Cinderella as a kid really benefited me so that I’d take arms and order you to show it to your kids, I don’t think it harmed my spiritual development and Torah knowledge, either.

    It was a cute movie, though.)

    #1006147
    Sam2
    Participant

    WIY: Most early folk tales (that modern “fairy tales” are based off of) are quite gruesome. That was normal in peasant life. It represented taking down the establishment. French and German folk tales are the most gruesome, with English and Italian being tamer. Hans Christian Anderson tales are most similar to our Disney-fied fairy tales today.

    rebyidd: That’s okay. In the original French folk tale (“La Belle.. La Monster, if I recall the title correctly), he married a dozen women then ate them after the wedding, which is why he was cursed to be the Beast.

    #1006148
    oomis
    Participant

    but now i can use your versions and entertain them in a yiddish way. thanks! “

    …uh… I get residuals…. (my pleasure, really!)

    #1006149
    TinyTim
    Member

    Fairy tales were meant to be scary. Hansel and Gretel was meant to teach kids not to go candy hunting in the forest. Little red riding hood was don’t daydream and wander off the path etc…

    #1006150
    seeallsides
    Participant

    Isn’t the story of Evil Serpent who made Chava eat the apple, Cain killing Abel, Kivshan Ha’Esh, Akeidas Yitzchok, Sodom, Tower of Babel, etc, etc scary? It seems like kids have the ability to develop normally and handle graphic stories on their own levels without lifelong trauma – Don’t lose any sleep over it – go learn, do mitzvos, chesed, and sincere devotion to Hashem..and maybe we will write the greatest story of them all with the coming of Mashiach.

    #1006151
    Shopping613 🌠
    Participant

    Twinkle twinkle Kchavim

    Way up in the Shamayim

    when you say Shma at night

    You know everything will be all right

    Twinkle Twinkle Kochavim

    Way up in the Shamayim

    #1006152
    🐵 ⌨ Gamanit
    Participant

    I’d say the story I found the most disgusting in the original was Sleeping Beauty. I find it strange how it was ever considered an appropriate story for little children.

    #1006153
    👑RebYidd23
    Participant

    Rapunzel is simply a stupid story.

    #1006154
    tzaddiq
    Member

    writersoul:

    did not mean to insult nor even hint of any flaw to anyone’s healthy and correct hashkofas. all i meant is that there is b”h so many stories that we are blessed in our generation that we can share and give over to our kids. why would i want to prioritize any of disney’s stories over any nice, cute, jewish story with a nice (realistic) happy ending(, with or without a lesson within)?

    hey, whether we like it or not, if we think about it, these goyish fairy tales are flawed with characters, heroes/heroines with bad middos, and are full of narishkeit.

    do you think i am depriving my kids by not showing them cinderella?

    #1006155
    HaLeiVi
    Participant

    The worst is Humpty Dumpty. After hearing that, I was so taken apart that all the kings horses…

    #1006156
    miritchka
    Member

    WIY: that comment about the Germans and the concentration camp was so out of line. WWII was not a joke.

    oomis: Any way you can write a book of fairytales with a yiddishe ta’am?! Although i do have a knack of telling stories, 1) I wont bring fairytale books into my home cuz even if i wanted to change around the story, the pictures tell otherwise. 2) I would rather tell a tale about tzaddikim/tzidkaniyos, middos books, stories with a lesson, etc.

    seeallsides: While the “stories” in the torah are scary, they are taught to young children in a way that they can handle it. As you get older the “stories” are taught in greater detail. For example: a child will learn about krias yam suf with the mitzriyim drowning. When you get older, you learn how some drowned right away, some slowly, and some suffered tremendously before dying.

    reyidd23: most of these ridiculous fairytales are just that and unfit to be read to children. Someone is almost always killed or dies. Someone always does something wrong-but no lesson involved.

    tzaddiq: +1

    #1006157
    oomis
    Participant

    come in small packages

    Fairy tales were meant to be scary. Hansel and Gretel was meant to teach kids not to go candy hunting in the forest. Little red riding hood was don’t daydream and wander off the path etc…”

    Right, so I ALWAYS work that lesson into my re-telling of these tales. I remind my grandchildren that Little Red Riding Hood got into trouble because she didn’t listen to her mommy, and that she was very sorry. And Goldilocks learned that she must NEVER walk out of her house when her mommy didn’t give her permission, or take things that don’t belong to her, even from nice bears who are happy to share their porridge.

    I haven’t told over Hansel and Gretel yet, because the story is really intrinsically a HORROR (wicked stepmom throws her kids into the woods to let them starve, they almost get eaten by a witch, and then they kill her by shovingher alive into a hot oven…OY!) But I am working on it…Until I get it right, I am not telling such a story to anyone who is not an adult! 😛

    #1006158
    oomis
    Participant

    Shopping, my kids always sang that version of Twinkle Twinkle, which they learned in nursery school. The original is fine, though.

    #1006159
    oomis
    Participant

    Miritchka, thanks for the suggestion – I may take you up on it.

    “Tales With Taam” hmmm…

    I think fantasy is a GOOD thing for children, it helps their imagination develop and thrive, and the creativity within them can flourish. Tales of Tzaddikim are wonderful – for OLDER kids. Nursery-age kids want to hear about magic menorahs and dancing dreidels. But they can also find wonder in fairytales, and I don’t think that’s a bad thing at all, if done right. Stories of our Tzaddikim also have scary elements at times. Anyone care to tell a youngster how Rabbi Akiva died??? We don’t focus in inappropriate topics for children too young to handle them. Many fairytales DO have inappropriate aspects. They were written in a different time and place. The idea for the adult, is to know and be selective of what you choose to read or tell to your children.

    #1006161
    tzaddiq
    Member

    oomis-

    +100

    the above post was one of the BEST posts i read!!!

    git gezugt!

    #1006162
    Shopping613 🌠
    Participant

    Oomis, totally agree, as long as they are jewish and kosher and do not have bad ideas mixed in…

    #1006163
    oomis
    Participant

    Tzaddiq, thank you, very kindly. And I can ALWAYS use a bracha for good gezunt. 🙂

    #1006164
    oomis
    Participant

    Oomis, totally agree, as long as they are jewish and kosher and do not have bad ideas mixed in… “

    The world is not only comprised of kosher Jews, or even only Jews. Our kids need to be brought up prepared to deal with the outside world and withstand some of the “bad ideas” they will likely encounter. They need the tools to prepare them for this, and reading a wide variety of literature can help to innoculate them.

    The best thing a parent can do, is read to and WITH his/her children. When encountering something questionable, that is a wonderful educational moment, and can jumpstart a great lesson for the future.

    When I read or told over the story of Goldilocks to my then three-year old granddaughter, I used that story to illustrate how naughty and dangerous it can be for a child to wander off without parental knowledge and permission. I asked my granddaughter did she think Goldilocks did a good thing or bad thing to go into someone’s house when they were not home, and use their things. At age three, she was able to tell me, “No Bubby, that was very bad. Her mommy should give her a time-out.” I asked her what she would say if she were making up this story, and she told me, she would ask her mommy for permission to visit the bears, and ask her to please call them up, see if it was ok to come over, and then take her there. And then she would make brachos on the porridge, because Goldilocks forgot to say Borei Minei Mezonos. (Yes, she really was ONLY three at the time. She is kinehora a very bright child). But I digress…

    Anything has the potential to be good and bad, and children’s literature is no different. We are adults, and it is up to us to get our children to have a healthy, but well-rounded view of their world. We do not live in a glass bubble.

    #1006165
    miritchka
    Member

    oomis: Tales with Taam…will keep an eye out for it!! Fantasy is definitely a good thing for children. i too think it is healthy for a child to use his/her imagination and learn lessons too. But why not read a Jewish themed fairytale as opposed to these horror-type fairytales? There are so many books out there for children that teach the same lesson that one can learn from, say Goldilocks or Pinnochio, that are written by Jewish authors using Jewish ideas and Jewish names. Unfortunately there is so much out there that they will see. Why not infuse them with lessons using Yiddishe ta’am, or fairytales and other figments of the imagination using Jewish ideas and such?

    That’s why I’ll be looking out for your book…!!;)

    #1006166
    oomis
    Participant

    I think that we have to be careful when we do Yiddish fairytales, because so much of that fantasy might be against Torah, i.e. writing about witches. But I am going to give this a LOT of thought, and see what and if I can come up with. Just a thought – was Goldy Lox, NOT Jewish?????????

    #1006167
    👑RebYidd23
    Participant

    You can let your kids read them when they’re older if they really want to.

    #1006168
    oomis
    Participant

    good gezunt. “

    Oops in my haste, I actually misread, gezunt for gezugt. Oh well, I can use a bracha or a compliment, either way. 🙂

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