Drinking Away a Bad Date

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  • #600071

    rasha gamur
    Member

    I know of a chashuv Rav who got dropped by a girl whom he felt was very promising, so he went to the pizza store, bought a whole, UNCUT pie and ate it straight – literally as one big [round] slice. So what about drinking away a bad date or dumping? Personally, i think that it’s a wonderful idea sometimes you just need to recover and let loose a little, so it’s mutar bishas hadchak.

    #973380

    why would a rasha gamur care if something is mutar or not?

    #973381

    stuck
    Member

    Why would a choshuv rov be dating a girl, let alone dumped by a girl?

    #973382

    klach
    Member

    “I know of a chashuv Rav who got dropped by a girl whom he felt was very promising, so he went to the pizza store, bought a whole, UNCUT pie and ate it straight”

    Apparently he wasn’t so chashuv back then.

    “So what about drinking away a bad date or dumping?”

    Thre is a huge difference between eating a whole uncut pizza and drinking. etc.

    “Personally, i think that it’s a wonderful idea”

    Good to know that you’ve mastered shas uposkim that your personal opinon matters.

    “you just need to recover and let loose a little”

    recover, yes. Let loose – show me where there is an inyan to take a vacation from being religious. This is so crum.

    “so it’s mutar”

    i am simply amazed beyond words at your stunning halachic prowess.

    “bishas hadchak”

    how exactly is this a shas hadchak?

    #973383

    OneOfMany
    Participant

    Is alcohol the ONLY thing that would make you feel better? That may be an issue…

    #973384

    rasha gamur
    Member

    “Why would a choshuv rov be dating a girl, let alone dumped by a girl?”

    Because twenty years ago, unlike in Europe of old, people didn’t get married off by their parents after kiddush in shabbos and actually went dating.

    #973385

    RABBAIM
    Participant

    Is that the way you would advise anyone who is confronted with any nisayon to react??? Drink it away?? Eat it away?? Escape into physical sensations??

    It looks like it is time for a little Chocvos Halevavos- Shaar Habitachon.. It certainly cheaper and more effective than alcohol….. although it too may be habit forming.

    #973386

    Please be Dan Likaf Zechus, it was probably not the first time a girl dumped him if he smelled so bad, and that also explains why he was still dating when a rav

    It’s pashut disgusting not to take care of body odor. Yet many people don’t. It’s truly appaling. Once, i was standing next to a chashuv rabbi and boy did he smell. Personally, I think it was a big chillul HASHEM.

    #973387

    The Rambam in Hilchos Deos 4:15 states that overeating is assur. End of story. People need to learn to deal with their emotions, rather than just eat/smoke/gamble/snort/drink them away.

    #973388

    OneOfMany
    Participant

    Good call, RABBAIM.

    #973389

    klach
    Member

    “Please be Dan Likaf Zechus, it was probably not the first time a girl dumped him if he smelled so bad, and that also explains why he was still dating when a rav”

    I think hes talking about a seperate Rav.

    #973390

    rasha gamur
    Member

    “Please be Dan Likaf Zechus, it was probably not the first time a girl dumped him if he smelled so bad, and that also explains why he was still dating when a rav”

    The bad smelling rabbi was a different story.

    #973391

    bein_hasdorim
    Participant

    R”G; Actually In the past, after a bad date i’d lay OFF the booze for a while…

    #973392

    be good
    Participant

    Oy vey, ppl, leave the guy alone!!!

    He just had a bad date!!! can we have some sympathy and support?

    Or at least, just let the guy have a drink…. without the guilt trip!

    So, my answer is a resounding yes. It’s ok to have a drink (or two) after a bad date or dumping.

    … my humble advice to you would be though…. don’t advertise it.

    Lotsa ppl do it… there aren’t many ways to stay sane and date… this is one of them… but shh! don’t tell anyone, bc anyone who isn’t dating and hasn’t been dumped… won’t get it!!!

    O, and BTW, by way of rabbanim… I/ we (my friends) have asked many sheilos over the years about what you are allowed to do to stay sane while dating and most rabbanim were surprisingly lenient. So really, lay off the guilt.

    You can go to shul the next morning like any other person and ask HaShem for more strength to cope with your nisayon. But in the meantime, in that raw, right after it happens moment… drink and then just head to sleep.

    Just don’t make too much of a habit of it, dating and getting dumped I mean. O and then drinking.

    #973393

    Toi
    Participant

    maskim to be good. its very easy for the bashers to bash. faced with a nisayon of similar proportion what would you do? and im sure that you guys do something else when youre down that others wouldnt, ie listen to something objectionable or watch something etc. you just think alcohol is worse and this dude doesnt. so lay off and chill.

    #973395

    mos yumos
    Member

    If you drink off getting dumped, there was probably a good reason she dumped you.

    #973396

    YW Moderator-42
    Moderator
Viewing 17 posts - 1 through 17 (of 17 total)
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