Soleik, what about "al tarbe sicha im ha'isha"?
Passfan, S.A. says it causes ze'nus. The reason is obvious. If the young man's wife looks like an old lady, or a young woman's husband is not physically fit, but rather is old-looking and frail, it could lead to problems, c^v.
YWN Coffee Room » Yom Tov » Chanukah
Cousins at Chanukah Party
(66 posts)-
Posted 5 months ago #
-
mdd, that could be the case with humongeous difference in age. But a 50 year old guy with a 22 year old wife (as the Chasam Sofer married) has been quite common in our history and isn't the large discrepancy the s"a refers to.
Posted 5 months ago # -
Just because something was done in the past, doesnt mean it should be done now
In the past a 13 year old boy could marry a 12 year old girl.
And I met about 15 years ago a woman from somewhere in the former soviet union who told us she was married at 15 1/2 (She was married in her country at 15 1/2, She came here after it was legal)
Posted 5 months ago # -
personally I think the post'r is asking whether its right to make the party?
in which case u should know these things only become an issue if YOU make them one
happy chanukah to allPosted 5 months ago # -
There is nothing wrong with an early marriage, if the spouses are mature enough. In parts of the former Soviet Union, it was legal for 16 year-old girls to get married without parental concent. In this country, people mature later.
Posted 5 months ago # -
The Ribnitzer Rov, in America about 30 years ago, married a 20-something year old girl when he was in his 60's.
Posted 5 months ago # -
Passfan, that's, for sure, not according to S.A. There are those that have proposed a heter, but it is not poshut. According to the S.A., a 60-year old may not marry a 20-year old.
Posted 5 months ago # -
"Soleik, what about "al tarbe sicha im ha'isha"?
ill take my chancesPosted 5 months ago # -
Soleik, divrei Chazal are divrei Chazal, and the gidrei Tznius they established are bindind on us.
Posted 5 months ago # -
i have a question. i thought that medically it is not a good thing to have a very similar gene pool for husband and wife.
yet when i hear about some of the weddings in the Jewish community i read of so and so 's grandson marrying so and so who is the grand niece of that very same rabbi.
why would that be permitted from a medical point of view?Posted 5 months ago # -
mdd: when the rest of my family stops talking to their female cousins ill think about it. ive never seen any breaches in tznius between any of them.
Posted 5 months ago # -
Violating "al tarbe" is a tznius breach in and by itself. To talk to cousins there might be room to be more lenient. Look in Gittin 90A on the bottom.
Posted 5 months ago # -
mewho, yes medical issues are a problem but I dint think the Torah talks in halacha about medical issues and the halochos of ervoh are quite clear
Posted 5 months ago # -
"have fun at your chanukah party and all works out in the end"
probably the dumbest thing i ever heard.
op- they wanna shmooze (or at least the guys) for bad bad reasons. so its bad.
Posted 5 months ago # -
Lifeisgreat
In answer to your original question (I'm guessing you want my opinion, not a psak halacha, otherwise you would have asked your Rav), I think it's okay to make the party. But teenage cousins of the opposite gender should not shmooze. My opinion.
Posted 5 months ago # -
i went to a chanuka party last night, and YES i spoke to my male cousins. is there a problem with that?
Posted 4 months ago #
Reply
You must log in to post.
RSS