Lomed Mkol Adam: We should put our dispute into the hands of a Rov or a Frum therapist who could give their professional opinion. Our back-and-forth friendly banter will provide no positive results to the Tzibbur. Rav Chatzkel Levenstain ZT”L makes a strong arguement that Middos Raos can lead people to do the worst of behavior, (and I add that “intentionally putting down another person for the sole purpose of feeling themselves self confident” is well within the boundaries of what Rav Chatzkel discusses). Clearly you are correct that many people will benefit from therapy and this could enable them to become much better spouses, but to ignore the impact of Middos development and the contribution of poor Middos development on abusive spousal behavior is equivalent to me, to throwing out the a full Chelek of the Shulchan Aruch.
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