yytz – never read, but are you sure he doesn’t say/mean that she should balance the books, budget etc, but according to the values and decisions set down or agreed upon by/with husband ?
BYM – There are halachos governing this, as every aspect of life. If you think a husband today should set things up differently for practical reasons, that’s one thing. But if you are simply not comfortable with this arrangement, do some research and deal with it. (Of course, Sam2 already noted that the halacha is not quite as simple as that. I’m sure R’ Miller, too, was not focusing on the halacha, but rather on what he perceived as the proper attitude of wife to husband. If some of the people on this thread would read his description of the ideal marriage relationship, they’d probably want to arrange public burning’s of his books. Not exactly sympathetic to feminist ideas.)
Being a good teacher/Rebbe is def. a skilled enough job to deserve way more than the going salary.
GAW – if i were to do exhaustive study of Ancient Egyptian Hieroglyphics, would that be ‘nothing’ ? I could probably find occupation in a different world than my own, publish books etc. yet practically speaking, in my personal life, it would be worthless. It is therefore conceivable to argue that if a women’s focus should be elsewhere, and she exerts much efforts in studying gemara, then its worthless – i.e. not bringing her to where she’s supposed to go. (As usual, I’m nor espousing my view, just saying I don’t see why you’re so incredulous about such a statement.)
And you know very well that even if such a statement was made, it had nothing to do with the speakers opinion about the ‘lowliness’ of women, so…