OURtorah:
You make some very valid points about how one may not judge or hate a fellow Jew. But please realize that criticizing somebody’s actions, lifestyle, and even their beliefs fall into neither of the above categories. In Judaism we believe in loving all Jews, but we also believe in standing up and declaring what is right and what is wrong. Bais Hillel, Bais Shammai, and the rest of the Tannaim and Amoraim certainly did not hate each other; but they did spend the vast majority of their time and effort vehemently arguing with each other about what is muttar and what is assur, what is right and what is wrong. One does not have to take away from the other.
DaMoshe:
“Modern Orthodox people don’t tell people to be less machmir.”
Al regel achas:
http://www.theyeshivaworld.com/coffeeroom/topic/gebrokts-on-pesach#post-517222
http://www.theyeshivaworld.com/coffeeroom/topic/gebrokts-on-pesach#post-517935
http://www.theyeshivaworld.com/coffeeroom/topic/gebrokts-on-pesach/page/2#post-518043
“If someone wants to accept a chumrah, go ahead. Just don’t try to impose it on others, and don’t look down on others who don’t keep that chumrah!”
It is absolutely true that one should not look down on others who are not holding where he is in avodas Hashem. But one should look up to those who are on a plane of avodas Hashem that is more elevated than that which is demanded by the Halacha. Going lifnim mi’shuras ha’din should not be regarded as compulsory, but it should be praised and celebrated.