a mamin writes:
“It really isn’t pashut… please ask someone who is knowledgeable in this area. Someone who is into names, not just a Rav. “
better idea; ignore mekubollim etc who tell you that names are important and ask a rov. (or ask your rov to ask a rov who knows)
Rav Chaim Kanievski is not concidered a mekubal by any stretch but he has been known to tell people to change their names (because their given name has either no mekor in tanach or has a bad connotation, even if they are not sick).
any mekubal who will take your money to tell you who your beshert is or isn’t is not worth the money.
Rav Yehuda haChossid wrote in his tzavo’oh to his children to be makpid about names of inlaws (if i remember correctly it works equally both ways).
Although it was only written to for his children (and there are many other things he wrote they should be makpid about which we in general ignore completely) many hold that one should be makpid about this issue.
if one of you has a double-barelled name (and uses it) then there is no problem. (if you don’t use it then you can start now)