My kid made a havdala place mat which we hold the candle over. otherwise I make havdala on beer, grapejuice, or wine in my siver kiddush becher over a plastic plate, and whole cloves straight off the grocery shelf for besomim.
Although we received a havdala set by my chasuna, my wife isn’t interested in polishing more silver, so we don’t use it. Which is totally fine with me.