joseph- you always select the quotes and omit the quotes that yo udon’t like.
The remo (siman 17-2) starts by saying that ‘noshim and avodim’CAN puton a talis and make the borcho and this is the shittah of a slew of rishonim. he then adds and says “Mechze ke’jehura” from one possek (the oggur) ,advising not to do it. Its translation is not ‘arrogant’ as you define it but that the person tries to show “‘ too much heigtened spirit’a and maybe the person is not qualified ot do it. we do lots of things that “mechze ke’jehruo’ yet we still do it (rabbeinu tam’s tefillin come to mind”. Anohter is eating in the sukoh while it rains (the expression in the shulcahn aruch is more damning). whatever the fact, people sometiems try too much. Thye should not be pilloried for this.
Lastly- R’ Moshe’s quote clearly indicates hat he is talking about women whose sole intention is ‘feminism”. I have met many who are very sincere and want to do mitzvas and it has nothing to do with feminism.