To Francorachel3
Bashert does NOT mean that it will happen.
It means that it is a match recommended in heaven,
all things being equal. Meaning if there is Emunah in Chaz”al
that a man should marry at 18-20.
No robber ever got away with the excuse that it was Bashert that he steal.
The Steipler berated an older Bochur that he botched up his Bashert because he dallied(Shteiged) and MISSED his Bashert.
Misplaced Emunah is very dangerous.
Everyone runs to Reb Chaim Kanievsky for his Bracha and NOT for his Hadracha!
He says that boys should start at 17.
The Chofetz Chaim married at 18 and Shteiged to become one of the greatest Poskim in our history.
How can anyone offer any excuse for boys to delay, when there are thousands of older single girls and their families who are suffering?
Is two years of Shteiging worth ruining the lives of so many.
In addition to the fact that the Nisyonos for single boys are so much worse today than ever before.
More boys than girls are born EVERY year (you can check it out.)
There are enough boys available for all the girls, IF they would start younger.
The supply of boys is being manipulated and held back from entering the market, similar to an artificial shortage of merchandise.
We ALL are responsible and should speak up to our Rabbanim, Roshei Yeshivos, parents and young men.
We are our own enemies.
Let us join SYR and bring about the necessary change to remedy the problem.