Sure popa, irrelevant to you, because you’re such a sensitive guy. For me, though, I want to know what people are feeling, because I might otherwise make them feel bad (in this case by pitying them).
The (ir)relevant passage:
Here’s my issue. Are we, the frum community, really so horrible that we degrade and devalue singles, while the secular world, that bastion of proper middos, has got it right? Of course not!
What’s going on here is that we’ve set the bar high for ourselves, according to the Torah’s values. We strive to live a life of meaning. We value our connection to Hashem and his Torah, and part of our job is to share this with others. We value tremendously the contributions of all, but HKB”H wants us to share our beautiful heritage with future generations.
If our lives consisted merely of working to earn money to eat to have strength to work, with some partying thrown in, why wouldn’t a twenty five year old with her whole life ahead of her be the envy of others? This same “value” system has them discarding the elderly, r”l.
We, on the other hand, who place value primarily (we hope) on the eternal, place great importance on raising a family. This in no say diminishes the accomplishments of the not yet married, but the fact remains that they share our values and want to contribute to klal Yisroel in SS meaningful way as possible. All humans have an innate desire to bring future generations, but we, as frum Yidden, on a different plane. Inevitably, someone who hasn’t yet married and had children feels “left out”. This is also why many childless couples in our community are in such acute pain.
Our values are not ch”v so messed up that we value people less than our counterparts in secular society; it’s the precise opposite.
I think the author of that piece should reassess her feelings toward our “culture” and not so readily agree to her well meaning but shallow thinking boss.
BTW, popa, I’m not being sarcastic. I similarly value the insight gleaned from your hagbah thread. It was an angle I hadn’t considered much, certainly not enough.