As long as people continue to perpetuate the myth that abusive Rebbeim (as described by TLIK and Syag, among others) are commonplace, the real solutions to the problems of kids at risk and OTD will remain elusive.
The assertion that there are “schools which boast…” (I dare not repeat such words) is slanderous. It is a most egregious example of motzi shem ra, and should be removed from the post.
As a Rebbe, I am greatly offended by the cavalier and careless manner in which I and my colleagues are so often maligned.
The vast majority of today’s Rebbeim would never imagine the sort of abuse that has been described here as being possible. Personally, I have a hard time believing most of these stories. They are simply not realistic. The picture of a Rebbe who had invested so much into one student’s spiritual growth acting like an animal is completely incongruous, to say the least. That story sounds like something out of the pages of certain magazines which love to exaggerate and distort issues of abuse in the classroom and the home, ??? ?????? ??????.
It’s a good thing this is an anonymous forum; otherwise, I would not be able to say the following, for fear of the appearance of self-serving arrogance:
The Rebbeim in classrooms today are warm, caring, loving individuals whose concern for their students is very nearly equal to that for their own children. They live and breathe their talmidim’s welfare 24/7. They NEVER resort to corporal punishment, and rarely (if ever) say more than a harsh word to a student, and this only after many, many attempts to diffuse a situation before it gets that far.
This is not to say that every Rebbe is perfect every day. When I have made mistakes in the management of my classroom, I have acknowledged as much to the class. I am not proud to say that this has happened once or twice over the years (and no, it never came near anything that anyone would label “abuse”). I am proud to say that when it did, I candidly admitted my mistake, and apologized publicly to the boy whom I had treated without the proper respect.
Yes, as a Rebbe, I treat my students with respect. As the Rambam rules.
I know many Rebbeim, in my own school, in the other schools in my community and in other communities throughout the country. All of them fit the description above. None of them would ever imagine abusing a student, physically or verbally.
This is not to say that there are no bad apples; it is to say that the bad apples in today’s chinuch system are very few, and very far between.