All suggestions above are valid. To add two.
There are Rabbis that are known for all types of things (monetary issues, science matters, chinuch etc.). In sticky situations, often one’s personal rav will defer to such a posek or such. In this case, a well regarded rav in these matters [ie dating/chosson issues] (I can think of the mashgiach of Long Beach, forgetting his name at moment or others) can be counseled with full privacy for your Rav and kallah. This is of course daas torah.
Another important note:
You are very upset (can tell from your post). Calm down and note the opportunity. This is a great lesson for marriage. Often, the other spouse upsets the other because of a matter that is unclear (in this case, you don’t even seem to know what problem your wife had!). The wrong thing is to close down and fill in the blanks with assumptions (ie she doesn’t have respect for daas torah or the halacha that the man is in control of halachic matters). And even if the matter is bad (ie your kallah’s points are lackluster), you still should not get upset. Please note, this is not a knock on you. It’s human nature. But you need to get ready for marriage now. Use this sensitive topic that is hard for you (this rav is very close and likely is a great person) to test yourself not to get upset with your wife. Try to have the follow up conversation with her but with a voice behind you alerting you to be patient and understanding. When you are engaged its not so hard. You do it, and then go back after to your dorm, apartment, or house and you’re single again. When you get married, you don’t go anywhere. The hole is dug and will just grow. Hashem wants YOU to grow, do it!
Hatzlacha Rabba.
Thirdly, maybe have the conversation at a restaurant or place that you know your kallah enjoys to lighten the mood and don’t start the date talking about it!