L613,
Look at it this way:
Don’t look at the hat, looks at what’s in his head.
Don’t look at the shirt, look at what’s in his heart.
Don’t look at the shul, look at his personal avoda.
Don’t look at the yeshiva, look at his personal learning.
Don’t look at the suit, look at the person within.
In shidduchim, probably more than anywhere else, the dictum of Chazal of “??? ????, ?? ????? ?????, ??? ??? ??? ??” (Do not look at the container, but rather what is in it) is extremely important. It’s too bad too many people look at the kankan and never look at the person inside.
The Wolf