Reply To: The Wicked Son

As Rabbi Wallerstein says, we don’t want to put kids in a situation where all they have to do is rebel and they’ll get a trip to Israel (all expenses paid), a new suit, and lots of warm and loving attention from adults that otherwise wouldn’t know they exist.

You know, I think he’s right about this. I speak as an atypical Bais Yaakov student- I’ve made some bad decisions in life, and therefore have relationships with amazing mentor type people. I see the jealousy on my good BY friends’ faces every time I get called out of class by my mechaneches, just to chat about things. The only way for anyone in school staff to take any interest in you is to get yourself a boyfriend, or wear a mini skirt.

I’ve seen girls surreptitiously pulling their skirts up every time this mechaneches passes them in the halls, hoping that she’ll notice them if they look like they’re going through something.

Interesting point, Letakein. But if the correct way to deal with the child is to be warm and caring, surely one cannot deny the child his ‘medicine’ just because you don’t want to set a precedent. If a patient is suffering from a life threatening disease, the hospital cannot decide to deny him his cure because it feels good, and other people will put themselves into a situation where they need it. And the Haggadah isn’t ‘parental advice from Rabbi Wallerstein’, it is Da’as Torah on how to be mechanech different types of sons.