1) These aren’t my special days for thanking Hashem and for mourning, respectively. That is not a big difference between us.
I disagree. There’s a big difference.
2) And I wouldn’t send my kids to the army, because I think it would harm their ruchniyos, but I respect, thank, and love you and your kids for defending our people. I hope you can accept this is not a big difference between us.
Again, I disagree. See Avi K’s response (not that I agree with him, but it’s a big difference, and he left out the most contentious point).