Reply To: What’s wrong with being Frum?

Thanks all for your posts.

Gavra – I meant Frum and not Krum. I meant when the words are used to describe someone or something negatively, usually marginalizing the person or action as ‘extreme.’

Joseph, Squeak, myshadow – Yes, it’s too often used to describe s/o as farfrumt.

dd – I don’t think that ‘Frum’ as a verb applies to your paragraph, “frum but not ehralch; focused on chitzonius instead of pninimus; careful in bein adom l’Makom, but not bein adom l’chaveiro; overly concerned with judging others frumkeit; etc.” — The right word woulf be lacking insight or mixed-up priorities, but those attributes ou wrote about aren’t really related to frumkeit.

SJS – Thank you!

Yashrus – It breaks my heart to read what you wrote. Sincere kavana is far from voodoo. It’s an immature attitude about observance that leads to ‘laughing at someone else’s sincerity.’ That, and not wanting to appear too ‘flipped out.’ Your words,

“The solution to all this is making torah a reality to u not just a tradition,” couldn’t be truer.

Along with, “one of the BIGGEST problems of our dor is the superficial world of America which clouds our minds.”

So, it seems to boil down to the fact that we’re very quick to label others as something, in order to make ourselves feel better or ‘higher on the totem pole.’

Along with the pervasive ‘superficiality rating system’ of today. It’s sad but true that within 5 seconds of meeting someone, we can assign them a label or place in our minds and judge ourselves in relation to them. This, I think, is a tactic of the Yetzer Hara, to justify our own behavior and deflect responsibility.

That being said, I started this thread after reading a comment where someone preferred to be referred to as, Frum But Normal as opposed to Very Frum. So it got me thinking…

In the end, frumkeit is the sincerity of a personal relationship with Hashem and our desire to further it and expand it.

Hashem wants our hearts – “Rachmana Liba Bai” (sp?) – Hey, I just realized that Klal Yisrael has the best Return Policy! Our chachamim garauntee that Hashem will take returns in any condition:) No matter how far we feel we’ve strayed or how ragged we’ve run ourselves, Hashem will ALWAYS accept a heartfelt, genuine desire to return. MOST IMPORTANTLY, in myshadow’s words, “People need to be aware that there is always room for growth!”