Joseph,
As someone who is originally from OOT, lived in NYC metro, and moved OOT, I really liked your opening post. It gave me a smile. I know that you are using some humor in your generalizations and caricatures, but there is much truth in it.
While you call the OOT’s hillbillies (and I think many in-towners agree – even if they won’t say it), you imply that in-towners are pretentious and always wanting more (“Yesh li rav” mentality), which is how many OOT’s view in-towners. OOT’s see that NYC metro has needed Jewish things, but the spirit is often lacking.
You captured the views of both sides.