Reply To: Invited to the Wedding Feast, not the Ceremony-would you be offended?

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#1142977
Ex-CTLawyer
Participant

@Meno

You understand most of the question.

My daughter wants the small chuppah and meal in CT. There is a maximum of 85 people who can be accommodated indoors or 200 outdoors. This would more than handle close relatives and close friends.

The NY Feast that evening would be for the 300-400 extended family relations and not so close friends (former classmates, bunkmates from summer camp) and acquaintances.

Inviting that list to the chuppah would not work, because if even 30% decided to make the drive we could not physically fit them in addition to the original chuppah/meal list.

If I had my way, the chuppah/meal would be in CT and We’d host a lavish Shevah Brochos in NYC during the week.

BUT, as my girls know: Daddy will pay, but mommy and the girls decide.

Now, If you were a 3rd cousin of the Kallah or Chasan (you share common great-great grandparents) would you be offended if you were not invited to an out of town chuppah and luncheon, but an in-town wedding feast that same night?

BTW>>>all invitations will have words to the effect that no wedding gifts be given, but Tzedaka given in the name of the couple would be appreciated. B”H the couple does not need material gifts or money from guests.