ThinkStraight: you wrote, “If things just happen to come up at lighting time, then you know it’s the yetzer hora!”
This reminds me of an incident involving Hillel HaZakain. A man repeatedly interrupted his Shabbos preparations to ask him silly, even insulting questions. Hillel did not yell at the man, but just calmly answered his questions each time. The man later admitted that he’d made a bet with someone that he could anger Hillel, but of course was unsuccessful.
So perhaps when “things just happen to come up” at candle lighting, it is indeed the yetzer hora, testing one’s ability to handle problems patiently and calmly.