SL:
i am sure that those who advocate for not being nice are doing so believing they are right
As do those who advocate compromising on Halacha in the name of being nice. But then gain, everyone believes they are doing what is right (although many only come o this belief after already deciding what to do, as yekke2 pointed out). As the famous saying goes, the road to hell is paved with good intentions.
But do you see anybody here advocating for not being nice?
yekke2:
MW – I don’t think its that people get sidetracked easily; people enjoy diverting the topic onto controversial topics they feel strongly about.
Touche.
The problems begin when cognitive dissonance causes rationalization, and people begin justifying their behaviour to be righteous
+1.
SL:
exactly! yes!
So can we all agree that the root cause of these various problems is not lack of appreciation of the importance of adherence to Halacha or of treating people correctly, but of just not thinking things through?