I said “equal say” is at odds with the Torah, in the context of the earlier discussion. Compromise and discussion is very much in line with the Torah. But that doesn’t mean equal say, when the Torah specifically specifies who has more say. Compromise and discussion ? equal say.
Why are you so hooked up on “force”? Technically a husband can take his wife to beis din — IF he wants to excersize that right – he doesn’t have to excersize it — to enforce his rights. Beis Din does the “enforcing”. (I think Rambam says even with a stick if necessary.) But I can’t imagine things even coming to that with people who are Torah loving. It is talking about a moredes.