I think that many of these individuals have been deeply hurt by the system, so to speak. Shidduchim, abusive rebbeim, insensitive rabbis (who probably shouldn’t be rabbis), inadequate education, divorce, unloving parents, etc. all take a deep and heavy toll on many people. The problem is that they conflate the essence of Torah with the institutions/societal factors that burn them. If I had chosen to conflate the religion with the institutions/personalities involved, I wouldn’t be frum. Maybe if I were born and raised in these institutions, I’d be more jaded. As a newcomer to Lubavitch (raised nominally MO), I maybe have rose-colored lenses.
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