Reply To: Hello….

there is a bully

there is a victom

and then there are the bystanders

The bully….Most of the time but NOT A FACT the bully was a victom or is still a victom of being bullied…surprisingly it could be anyone from…

parents …sibblings..rabbis…freinds…neighbers anyone..if bullying goes on enough he feels angry.. hurt..surpressed..

These feelings are very painfull….he needs an outlet…either he becomes a nabach in action and feelings…or he finds a victom to let out his steam…

The victom…the bully chooses his victoms carefully..he will not pick on a popular kid cause he knows he will fail..he tries to get that quiet good child who never does any trouble .. now he has a chance to build himself up by putting him down…he knows this kid is a too good kid to fight him…so there he goes all his pain is thrown out on this kid…most of the time the bully knows he is wrong but that need to feel superior just takes over…

The bystanders..usually the bully will act up in front of other kids were he can show off …the bystanders become frightened they shouldnt be picked on so they try to be on the good side of the bully …laughing and teasing along…even if these kids are good kids and would never do so …but there fear takes over…they try to team up with the bully… that makes them feel secure..they got a strong bully to protect them….and of course the more kids team up the more superior the bully feels..and the wourse the victom feels lost between a big croud…

The solution…there are many different ways to handle this situation..will discuss some…

In this situation the bystanders have the most important role…

If the bystanders would not fear the bully and say something nice to the victom or even better just walk away with the victom the bully is left alone …no one to show off ..no one to bully….

Another solution…because the bully is full of pain he wants his victom to suffer to…if the victom understands that then it will be easy for him to just shrug him off ..walk away …find freinds …and not become effected…

Fact… girls bully to.Since girls are by nature more sensetive it can leave a life time impression.

The bully..he is the one that needs the most help…cause he is the most troubled …

Bullying does not have to be that aggressive..sometimes just rolling your eyes …smurking…pulling your nose can be as painful ….

Parents and teachers should be well aware and be ready to assist..

Many schools have developed a NO BULLY ZONE..they talk to there students about bullying ..the kids act out bullying scenes …there taught how to respond… posters of no bullying are hung in classes and halls…and the teachers keep a strong eye on there suroundings ….I hope this information will be spread..spoken about to the public to avoid bullying and bring more ahavas yisrael…