bigben2: “So according to this “realization of your relationship with Hashem”, would you say that you receive reward/punishment relative to each individual mitzvah/aveirah, or is there a specific point on the scale which is your relationship with Hashem (mitzvos push you up the scale, aveiros push you down), and their is no “itemized” accounting?’
You get rewarded for each Mitzvah and punished for each aveira, regardless of how good or bad you are over all. Hashem is not “mevater” on any Mitzvah or aveirah. By Reshaim, Hashem often rewards them in this world for their Mitzvos because every Mitzvah must be rewarded, and this way He won’t “have to (kaviyahol)” reward them in Olam Haba. By Tzadikim, Hashem often punishes them in this world, so that they won’t have to go to gehenom.
Every little bad thing that happens to you can act as a kapara for your aveiros so that you won’t have to get gehinom. It is brought down that even if you reach into your pocket for one type of coin and bring out a different type of coin, the little bit of suffering that you feel can be a kapara for your aveiros.
Also, before you get too nervous about gehinom, remember that you can do teshuva for EVERYTHIING!!! (even letting your knees and elbows show, happygirlygirl)