If your wife does not want to be married to you, why do you even bother, Even if the Beis Din refuses to grant your divorce. Having a wife who hates you and doesnt want to be with you is not a great experience either.
I am not divorced or a divorce lawyer, but in general if a couple must get divorced an amicable divorce is the best way to go especially if there are children. Even if the couple hates either other, they need to be civil for the children.
I am guessing here, but if there is already a civil divorce, Most Beis Dins will just grant the Get, Most Beis dins really have no desire for couples to stay together who hate either other, or at least one of them wants out. They know its a recipe for disaster