Reply To: obtain a beis din's preliminary ruling without actually going to a beis din

Winnie, what if it’s just bad advice? At our 1st of 2 meetings with our Rabbi, I suggested that the differences between us weren’t all that great, e.g., we agreed on kids, shul, money issues, etc… I was hoping this would motivate our Rabbi to urge us to go to marriage counseling to find out how real our diffs were and whether they could be resolved. Instead, our Rabbi quashed my questioning by asking me how I thought it made my wife feel by minimizing her issues like that. In other words, the Rabbi took my constructive suggestion & turned it into how I’m continuing to be abusive. Which in my opinion, improperly hardened my wife’s position that she needs a Get and counseling being out of the question.