I didn’t realize that the wife complained to the Rabbi for the last 11 years. I don’t think the wife wants a divorce, because she would have petitioned Ba Jewish Court for divorce, she just want to torment her husband. If you perform an experiment a few times and get the same result and keep doing it hoping for a different result you are a fool, which is what the Rabbi seems to be trying to do.
You should know that by going to counseling you may finally find out what actually is bothering your wife. But it will only work if the husband and wife talk honestly as to what the problems are. Depending on the complexity of these problems this can be resolved in a few sessions, although it can sometimes take 5 years or longer before a determination can be made that the couple has irreconcilable differences and should be divorce.