Person1 – I have a higher opinion of Joseph than that. I think that he is capable of seeing reason and acknowledging when he is wrong. I’m not 100% sure yet if my opinion of him is justified, but I’m not giving up on him yet.
Joseph – “Lilmod, the topic of discussion as asked by the OP is (to directly quote him) “whether her reasons for wanting a Get are halachically sufficient or not.” He was not asking whether he should be “encouraged or discouraged from giving a divorce” as you keep insisting. As an aside, in my opinion, the stage the OP is in would be where they’d be discouraged from jumping to divorce and encouraged to work on reconciliation.”
Joseph, I will have to go back and reread the entire thread from beginning to end (as I advised you to do), but I really thought that your comments were in response to my comment to the effect that AFTER they have tried reconciliation, IF the Rabbanim and therapists feel that the marriage is not viable and that they should get divorced, and his wife still hates him and is insisting on a divorce, he should not be stubborn and refuse to give his wife a get for many years.
If your comments were in response to that, then the implication is that there is no reason he should feel that he should give a Get even in the above situation.
I definitely took your comments that way, and if that is not what you meant, I think that it is important that you clarify that and make it very clear, since I imagine there are others who understood your comments that way. Gofish and I both certainly did, so I imagine there are others. There are thousands of people reading this (possibly) and it is important that that be clarified so that people don’t come away with a really negative and incorrect view of Torah Judaism and/or Chareidi Judaism, which I am sure was not your intention.
As for your last point, I agree with you 100% that they are at stage in which they should be working on reconciliation and not jumping to divorce, and I thought that I had made that very clear. However, it is POSSIBLE that the reconciliation will not work and a divorce will be necessary and I felt that it was important that I point out to Lenny that if that happens he should not withold the divorce.
The reason I pointed this out now is because I don’t know Lenny and I will probably never have a chance to tell him this again. I did feel (although I can’t know for sure) that this MAY be something that he might need to hear. I did not think that he needed to hear that he should be attempting reconciliation and not jumping to divorce since that was something that was already clear to him.