Reply To: obtain a beis din's preliminary ruling without actually going to a beis din

Lilmod, you say “IF the Rabbanim and therapists feel that the marriage is not viable and that they should get divorced, and his wife still hates him and is insisting on a divorce, he should not be stubborn and refuse to give his wife a get for many years.” Lilmod, I agree. The problem is we’ve only gone to our Rabbi. Our Rabbi was initially adamant that I was controlling and abusive to my wife & kids. After not being able to provide even one example, he said in all honesty he didn’t know & was only going on what he was told. I’m afraid my Rabbi inadvertently validated my wife’s thoughts about me. I’m not saying anyone did anything maliciously. I’m just saying between my wife’s allegations & our Rabbi buying into them all, he may have inadvertently made a bad situation worse. This assumes I’m not really controlling and abusive; which I’m 99.99% sure I’m not. Hopefully, when we meet with the Rabbi from the Beis Din in Lakewood for a shaila, he will order us to marriage counseling & my wife will agree to go. Hopefully, the marriage counseling will be able to resolve our issues, m”h.