BS”D
The rov of a shtibl on a busy commercial street was shocked to discover security camera footage proving that the fire damage caused to his shtibl by the incineration of the neighboring kosher butcher shop was not an act of anti-Semitism. Instead, it was the work of the butcher himself, who torched his own shop and let the fire just scorch the shtibl so that it looked like anti-Semitism.
In order to get the insurance due to him and to get an innocent local kid off the hook, the rov had to testify against the butcher, his childhood friend, who was aptly named Feivish Feuerstein. Keeping in mind the halachos involved, the rov was very, very reluctant to testify in a non-Jewish court, but he knew he had to do so nevertheless. He also knew that it was far from being Feivish’s first incendiary offense, as the store had been torched several times in the recent past.
The judge asked: “Rabbi, how well do you know the defendant? What can you say about him?”
And the rabbi replied: “Oy, your honor, I have known Feivish since we were children in the old country. Let me tell you something, all his life, he was a very special person. He did eveything with such a bren, you know, such a fire, he davened mit a bren, he learned mit a bren, and it was such a great fire, it always spread from one place to another, from his store to my shil, you know what I mean…”
Needless to say, Feivish now learns in Federal Koilel.