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A man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by. He

gets into the taxi and the cabbie says,

“Perfect timing. You’re just like Frank.”

Passenger: “Who?”

Cabbie: “Frank Feldman. He’s a guy who did everything right all the

time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened like that

to Frank Feldman every single time.”

Passenger: “There are always a few clouds over everybody.”

Cabbie: “Not Frank Feldman. He was a terrific athlete. He could have

won the Grand Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like

an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have

heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy.”

Passenger: “Sounds like he was something really special.”

Cabbie: “There’s more … He had a memory like a computer. He

remembered everybody’s birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and

which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I

change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Frank Feldman, he could do

everything right.”

Passenger: “Wow, some guy then.”

Cabbie: “He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid

traffic jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But

Frank,he never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make

her feel good. He would never answer her back even if she was in the

wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too. He was

the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Frank


Passenger: “An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?”

Cabbie: “Well, I never actually met Frank. He died … I’m married to

his widow.”