Benignuman: “GAW, It seems to me that dating by definition is non-platonic activity.”
Which is exactly why I have an issue with the following two sentences:
“and playing or having fun in a non-platonic manner (“????”).”
“… because the whole purpose of such places is schok, which is asur to engage in with the girl.”
If: A. Schok = having fun in a non-platonic manner
and B. A date by definition is non-platonic.
Then,C: it can’t be assur to have “schok” on a date.
The whole idea of a date is that it’s not platonic, so it has to be okay to have a non-platonic relationship for the purpose of marriage. Unless you think that everyone’s parents should marry them off and no one should date at all, but the Gedolim are certainly not saying that (and they do know that people date even if they don’t know exactly what they do on dates).
Also, I was always taught that “there’s no such thing as a platonic relationship” which is why men and women are not allowed to talk to each other more than necessary (but if it’s necessary it’s allowed even though it can’t be platonic).