“Is it really that bad if im 20 and still not dating?”
No. I wish I hadn’t started dating at 20. I only started then because I was literally forced to.
Even though most girls start at around 19, a lot of them anyhow don’t get married until they are 21 or 22 (at least from the girls I know – I don’t have any statistics).
I would guess that that may be because the boys only start at 23 or 24, and not everyone’s zivug is 4 years older than them, so their zivug was not even dating yet when they started dating.
Also, a lot of girls nowadays are not ready yet to be married at 20. Plus, many are in school and need to finish before they can get married. Even if they are not in school, it can be very helpful or even necessary to have the time to figure out what you want to do parnassah-wise and to start getting training in something. If you want to marry someone who is learning, this can be very important.
I’m not saying there is anything at all wrong with starting to date before or at 20; I’m just saying that you shouldn’t feel like you have to start before or at 20.