I wrote that they can lead to sinas chaim. That doesn’t mean that they are always sinas chinas.
On the other hand, to some extent, the concept of labeling and dividing Am Yisrael does have an aspect of sinas chinam which is why these labels should only be used when necessary.
Is it necessary to describe the Jew you met as a Chiloni? Why not just call him a Jew? Shouldn’t you view the essence of his identity as being that he is Jewish and not that he is Chiloni?
Also, it is not so poshut to say that there is nothing negative about the terms. It is definitely a negative thing to be chiloni. Even if it’s not the guy’s fault because he is a tinok shenishba.
And when you are talking about Frum Jews, why do you have to emphasize our differences? Why do you have to give someone a label just because they celebrate Yom HaAtzmaut differently than you do? Why not emphasize the fact that you both keep 613 Mitzvos, learn Torah, believe in the 13 Ani Maamin’s, try to have Yiras Shamayim and Ahavas Hashem, and try to live a life of Avodas Hashem?