Home › Forums › Decaffeinated Coffee › Shidduchim and not having family money 🤵👰🚫👨👨👦💸 › Reply To: Shidduchim and not having family money 🤵👰🚫👨👨👦💸
No one is talking about 60-80 years ago, we are speaking about current times and the baal batim who build and support our Torah institutions in the late 20th and 21st century CE.
Your comments about the majority of Frum Jews in Europe is laughable because the VAST MAJORITY were barred from higher education by anti-Jew laws.
My paternal side came to the USA in 1872 from the Litivish Heim, my maternal side in 1868 from Bavaria. They were restricted by law to certain trades and barred from the Universities in most cases. By 1880 my great grandfathers were in University in the US. ALL my grandparents attended university in the nineteen teens. The men went on to get medical and legal degrees. The women got degrees in education and licenses.
I grew up on a block of 6 single family houses built in 1951. All were occupied by Frum families. All 6 husbands owned their own businesses, 5 had college degrees. The sixth was trained in electronics by the US Army during WWII and he owned and operated a chain of TV/Appliance stores (his children all went on to college and professional school after yeshiva. 5 of the women has college degrees, in fact my mother had a doctorate in child psychology and was a school principal. The 6th woman was a registered nurse. In those days it was a 3 year post high school program, but offered no Bachelor’s degree.
There were 35 children in those 6 families. We went to day schools, yeshiva high schools of Chabad girls high schools (there was one in town). Every single one of us went on to college and more than 20 to graduate school. Not one married before college graduation. Some like my eldest sister graduated college in May and married the week after Shavous.
Now we are all grandparents, we didn’t let our children marry until they had a proper education and could make their own way in the world. Even my Brother-in-Law, who grew up 2 doors from us and went to Torah Vadaath, also completed a college degree before my father would allow him to marry mys sister. He went on to spend 40 years as a pulpit rabbi, finishing 2 advanced degrees while working.
Back in Europe, you might have been able to find the odd Frum medical doctor, but the open opportunity for higher education was closed to Frum Jews.